Worrying about the Future

[Sheils]

I wonder if anyone else can relate to this?

I constantly worry about things I will have to deal with in the future in particular the death of those closest to me (although strangely enough, not my own death)

I am in my late thirties and live with my partner of nearly twenty years but we have no children. I worry about how I will cope if he is no longer around and this leads to me being fairly posessive, constantly wanting to know where he is and if he is safe.

Equally I worry if he will be able to cope if something happens to me.

The frightening thing is that one of these scenarios WILL happen and I wake up each day thinking "will it be today?"

These disturbing thoughts plague my life and I dread going out.

 

[GloomySunday]

Worrying about the future can take away the pleasure of the moment. Try not to worry about the unknown. We never know what lies around the next corner...for better or for worse.

When tragedy struck me I didn't know what to do, how to cope...but people around me did. It's at times like that when we need our friends and our families - they are the ones who will be there to help you pick up the pieces. Just as you will be there for them.

If you lose a loved one, one of the comforts you will have is of good memories, of good times shared. Don't let those memories be ones of times spent worrying!

Foster those friendships, strengthen those family bonds. You don't have to cope with tragedy, it's a shared experience. And it's one that's earned over time.

 

[Liz17]

Im sure its not the same as how your feeling, but Im always frightened about my mum for instance leaving the house and having an accident. I dont know how I would cope without her, at least I know why I have thoughts like that. Shes my only support and Im frightened that support wont always be there, and Ill have to cope on my own. Im a very anxious person so the thought of kids terrifies me, I'd be constantly worrying all the time. So I can Kind of see what your saying.

 

[Sheils]

Thanks for your comments both of you.

GloomySunday you are so right when you say we shouldn't waste precious moments worrying. But of course it's easier said than done.

I think it's because there's no escaping having to deal with the loss of loved ones. I worry about such trivial things on a daily basis that this monumental thing seems much more than I could ever cope with.

You are right though about people being there for you - I am lucky that I do have others that care about me but unfortunately, it seems to be no comfort to me.

I think this is because that apart from my partner, no one knows the extremes of my anxiety. Even my own parents don't know - I have become fairly clever in hiding it - always having excuses ready to avoid situations where I may panic.

That's where I agree with you Liz. I would lose my only real support, effectively.

But I feel very selfish in thinking this way.

I am a just sick and tired of it clouding my thoughts.

 

[GloomySunday]

I Can Never Go Home Anymore

My mother died very suddenly, without warning. It was a terrible shock. Though the aftermath of her death was very traumatic, the memories I have of her are good. I last saw her the night before she died and had a good laugh with her. That is my final memory of her and it's a good one. Hold onto those. If you live in the moment with your loved ones, the memories will be good and they will help you through the pain of their loss. You will grieve enough when the time comes, try not to add to it by grieving before the event as well, hard though it is not to.

 

[bitingthepea]

same !
i worry aswell its awful... but i worry about deaths, loosing friends, n all the so called normal stuff in life
it really gets me down