Work

[java]

Hello, Just logged on tonight and found this website and i need help. I get on fine with friends and my partner friends, but see when it comes to work i have problems. I have just started a new job as a secretary and i get on fine with the other secretaries, no problems with conversation, but see when it comes to the guys i work for i just cant think of anything to say. I just go blank and wish that they dont come near me so i dont have to speak. When i do say something, i just feel stupid. I feel i'm not interesting enough, but i dont know why i feel this way as i get on with the other secretaries no problem and can chat away. Our team have organised a lunch on Thursday and i am dreading it. There is only 7 of us so the table will be small, i just dont want to be sitting there like a complete loser and not able to join in the conversation. I have even been online trying to find "top ten conversations". I am getting myself in such a mess over it that if this wasnt a new job then i would make some excuse that i was ill that day. I really want to get over this and i have no clue how to. Its ruining a fantastic job with prospects! Does anyone have any advice?

 

[nate1956]

hi

i know what your saying. dont put too much pressure on yourself. itll make matters worse. if you get along with your secatarys go along with the flow. now the guys- just tell them your shy at the beginning

good luck. let me know how you make out

bobby

 

[java]

Thanks for the reply. Went into work today and found out that they are now organising a weekend away just for the team. I really do want to go but its my SP which is letting me down. I am sure i will end up making an excuse. But anyways, i went into work with a positive attitude, tried to keep a conversation going with a work colleague but all i could manage was 2 sentences. I hate being like this. It only really started happening to me when i moved jobs 5 years ago. But being in a new job and trying to make any impression is really hard. Got very overwhelmed in the afternoon and ended up in the toilets having a little cry to myself. Its not like they are horrible people. I just dont know what to do! Would this be a problem i can talk to my GP about? I always feel like i would be wasting their time.

 

[Ernie]

I'm not sure what you mean by GP, but I'm guessing it's general practitioner or something. I that case, yes you can. Here in Norway he or she will refer you to a psychologist which will gives you the advantage of inexpensive appointments with certain psychologists. I don't know how this works outside of Norway, but the general practitioner will be able to talk to you about it and find a good solution for you, but not help you himself/herself. Just talking about your problem out "loud" do really help though.

 

[java]

Oh Well, Couldnt do it, i didnt go into work today so i could avoid being embarrassed at lunchtime. Damn why does it need to be like this!