mikebird
Banned
Trying to dig myself out of the hole I've dug for myself...
There are / have been great things which cheer me up instantly.
I remember pre 10-yr-old times of Xmas with family, when I had my first go at drinking - plenty of wine, and it turns a kid into a different person then, for a few hours. A lot o' laughing & fun
Then, this morning, it's rare to have the doorbell ringing, which immediately changes my outlook from introverted webperson to... "Yeah!! Let's go out and have a giraffe! What have you been doing all this time?!?!?"
But a quick look outside to identify the person ringing as nobody I know, probably getting the wrong number on the apartment list, sends me right back into my shell.
It's been a long, long time since I was the spark of a group, who initiated something for us to do. I am now sure that the next time anything like that happens will be years between, and the person who does it, will be anyone other than myself. But it feels good to have some fragile connection left, who will be having some good times, right now, and if someone won the lottery, or one of my nieces graduated, I might be invited out, or to a wedding.
I know one thing for sure. If this happened, I'd drop everything I was doing (including *nothing*), have a shower, brush up immaculately, and be right there, and I'd feel on top of the world.
There are / have been great things which cheer me up instantly.
I remember pre 10-yr-old times of Xmas with family, when I had my first go at drinking - plenty of wine, and it turns a kid into a different person then, for a few hours. A lot o' laughing & fun
Then, this morning, it's rare to have the doorbell ringing, which immediately changes my outlook from introverted webperson to... "Yeah!! Let's go out and have a giraffe! What have you been doing all this time?!?!?"
But a quick look outside to identify the person ringing as nobody I know, probably getting the wrong number on the apartment list, sends me right back into my shell.
It's been a long, long time since I was the spark of a group, who initiated something for us to do. I am now sure that the next time anything like that happens will be years between, and the person who does it, will be anyone other than myself. But it feels good to have some fragile connection left, who will be having some good times, right now, and if someone won the lottery, or one of my nieces graduated, I might be invited out, or to a wedding.
I know one thing for sure. If this happened, I'd drop everything I was doing (including *nothing*), have a shower, brush up immaculately, and be right there, and I'd feel on top of the world.