Venting, does anyone care??

[lifesnotfair]

Basically i post on these fourms because i try and vent. I have nobody else i can vent to about these issues, and it drives me nuts not trying to speak my mind on these issues.

Some people have said that i post too much on here and its not constructive, but what else am i going to do? I have seen counsellors, i have talked to my doc, and there hasn't been any change in my way of thinking. And i know that you may think that I can only change the way i see the world. However, i don't believe that, because if that was the case, i wouldn't be in this boat.

People say that Only I can help myself out of this rut that i am, well that is not true either, because obviously i would be helping myself if i could. its like i am trapped in hollow cube of cement that is like 10 ft tall, and your a tiny ant trying to pick away at the cement trying to get free. I am like the ant in this case

People tell me to smile all the time, which annoys the hell out of me. Because if i could smile i sure would. But right now i can't. This goes the same thing with my interests. This may sound like a pile of excuses, but its not. I am being dead honest on these issues. I am pretty tired and frustrated. I wish i could just clean out all my bad experiences and start again, however sadly that is not possible.

 

[miss_amy]

I think it is you that has to help yourself but I also think the time has to be right for you to do it and for you to see clearly what it s you have to do. Maybe you are not there yet and that's ok.
I know exactly how to help myself (don't ask its not something I can put in words and I'm sure its different for everyone anyway) but somedays I just can't face doing it.

If venting here helps then carry on. Surely thats what the forum is for, venting and sharing how we feel.

 

[Kien]

I thought you ment something else with venting...

 

[coriander1992]

People say that Only I can help myself out of this rut that i am, well that is not true either, because obviously i would be helping myself if i could. .

Unfortunately that is true. Just because you don't know how to help yourself does not mean that you actually can't do it.
You are the only person that can help yourself, there is no magical potion that will take all of the bad things out of your life, but I don't need to tell you that, you know it already.

Ok, so maybe you are stuck in that huge cube of cement, so how do you get out? Well you can't just break out of it...it's too strong, but you can't very well just sit there and moan about being stuck in there, so what do you do?
You start chipping. Slowly chipping away at the cement, until one day you're free of it. That's the only way.
Another person could help speed it up a bit, but they can't get you out by themselves, you have to do the hard part yourself. It may well take you years to get out, but isn't it worth it? And in the meantime, vent all you want. We all need to at some point and it usually helps you to make sense of your thoughts.

Good luck, lifesnotfair

 

[ghostpicnic]

I think there is a reason why helping someone directly is a bad thing.
The saying "Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will eat for a lifetime."

I read about a therapist (I think he was one) noting in his book that if he assumes he knows of the others' problems (the fact being he can never really know because he is not his patient) and gives them an answer, they'll be satisfied temporarily but then will become dependent on his answers to get by.

 

[lifesnotfair]

how many years 10, 20,40, 60 years?

i can't wait that long

 

[PhantomPod]

I wish i could just clean out all my bad experiences and start again, however sadly that is not possible.

Oh man, you and me both. And probably many many many others.


I do believe that you are the only one who is able to help yourself. Though yes, I know that it is hard and basically doesn't seem possible. And when you try to help yourself and get nowhere it definitely makes you feel frustrated and like you're no closer to being who you want to be.

I don't even know what to say, because I certainly feel like I haven't gotten anywhere with my attempts are trying to help myself either. Your username is so right. Life is not fair! [/i]

 

[ghostpicnic]

People say that Only I can help myself out of this rut that i am, well that is not true either, because obviously i would be helping myself if i could.

Why do you feel as if you can't help yourself? What causes you to feel trapped?

 

[coriander1992]

how many years 10, 20,40, 60 years?

i can't wait that long

That depends on you.

If you want to get better, then you haven't a choice of how long you wait, i'm afraid.