marleysghost
Member
I have had this same reoccurring thought for years and at times it dissipates an d usually loneliness or stress brings it one. Unfortunately this falls under the HOCD area. I am afraid that my orientation is being questioned and have i lived a lie all of these years. This same intrusive thoughts with the SAME scenario has only become more elaborate over the years. It started around the age of 8. I am tired of wasting the years of my life away with this phantom menace but no matter how much I try to squash it, it feels like it is steam rolling at this point and my sleep is now effected. I want to seek counseling but I am too ashamed and embarrassed to discuss this issue face to face with a clinician. It feels more comfortable to do it annonomously on a post such as this. I hope I not alone in this I feel like crap and feel like my life is slipping away from me as this continues to tighten its strangle hold on me