I'm currently applying for several universities in order to get a degree in something and after that a job. The problem is, I'm very scared to go to examination areas, let alone use public transits to get there...
A few days I ago I had the first examination: I had waited the day in dread for 2 weeks. The anxiety did not stem up from the exam itself, but public places, taking transits and such things. I guess the fact that I don't go outside in daylight often doesn't help me either
. I had planned every detail to minute, but it didn't help me that much, I spent two weeks with little sleep and eating, escaping to internet and video games. As the day neared, I nearly chickened out from doing the exam, but managed to suck it up and go for it anyway.
I usually got calm during the trips forth and back, but when I had to wait/be around with people, I felt horrible inside: constantly overthinking when a person looked at me for too long, what they said/really meant, what they are thinking about etc. I think I managed the social interactions decent and the test went even better (the only thing I practically wasn't worried about) but by the time I got home, I was exhausted both emotionally and physically.
The funny thing is that I spent 6 months in a compulsive military service just recently and I thought that I'd straighten out my anxiety in there, but no: I feel every single fear I did while before the army, even worse actually. I've been like this for several years for now, socially awkward and aware of it...
Do anybody have similiar experiences in matters like this, how do you deal with it, tips? I've got more entry exams coming up, and frankly I'm not too eager for them...
A few days I ago I had the first examination: I had waited the day in dread for 2 weeks. The anxiety did not stem up from the exam itself, but public places, taking transits and such things. I guess the fact that I don't go outside in daylight often doesn't help me either
. I had planned every detail to minute, but it didn't help me that much, I spent two weeks with little sleep and eating, escaping to internet and video games. As the day neared, I nearly chickened out from doing the exam, but managed to suck it up and go for it anyway.I usually got calm during the trips forth and back, but when I had to wait/be around with people, I felt horrible inside: constantly overthinking when a person looked at me for too long, what they said/really meant, what they are thinking about etc. I think I managed the social interactions decent and the test went even better (the only thing I practically wasn't worried about) but by the time I got home, I was exhausted both emotionally and physically.
The funny thing is that I spent 6 months in a compulsive military service just recently and I thought that I'd straighten out my anxiety in there, but no: I feel every single fear I did while before the army, even worse actually. I've been like this for several years for now, socially awkward and aware of it...
Do anybody have similiar experiences in matters like this, how do you deal with it, tips? I've got more entry exams coming up, and frankly I'm not too eager for them...