Somebody help please

[Roland]

HI

Can somebody please help, I suffer from social phobia and evey time i leave the house people cough and yawn at me like when i walk down the road people will fake cough or yawn at me, I know people obvisoly do this but it hard to get someone to believe me. i have had this for 4 years of my life and dont know what to do , My doctor reconmened me to have Hypnosis which i did for 6months but did not have any effect on me, I just want to know what it all means. Also when im driving i notice every one doing like hand signal under the nose at me, I know this sounds abit stupid bit its just a nightmare for me.

Thanks

 

[nickabcuk]

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[Roland]

Thanks for your reply

I forgot to mention that it is total strangers that sniff,cough yawn and do these things to me, which makes it more Worrying for me, i just cant leave the house anymore and thinking of commiting suicide,i have seen a psychotherapist and he said it was Chronic anxiety but it just getting worst for me, I know 100% that people are doing these things to me but i just cant explain it.

 

[nickabcuk]

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[Roland]

Roland,

It sounds like your situation is causing you a lot of pain. I think it would be a good idea to speak to your your doctor, psychotherapist or maybe a different counsellor/therapist about how you feel about these things and to what degree that's affecting you, like having suicidal thoughts.

I know that when I was very anxious and found it difficult to leave my house or answer the phone that I was in a lot of emotional pain, it felt like everyone hated me, I was extremely lonely and hated myself and my life. At one point I was extremely frustrated with my life and it all felt hopeless. I was very scared and I thought I was going crazy. I didn't understand what was going on in my head.

I'm really glad that started believing that my situation could be different in the future, because now it is significantly better and I feel a lot better about my life and myself. I believe you can change this, just taking little steps each day towards helping yourself, understanding yourself and resolving these feelings supprisingly soon add up.

I hope you too can distance yourself from your pain enough so that you can see how things can be better for you. They won't get better on their own though, your input is essential, but there are people who can help you with doing that.

I think you've made a really positive step by posting how you've been feeling on here and how these things are affecting you. I really respect you for doing that. Sometimes we isolate ourselves because we're scared and in pain, It is in those times when we sometimes need to be a little couragous and reach out to those who can help us, so they can and so that our pain can start to be replaced with something better.

I don't know if they are real or not myself, I've never been with you when they're happening. It seems like these things are very really to you and I won't assume that I know your life and experience better than you. Whether they are happening or not. It's what they currently mean to you that's most important. Do you think it could be useful for you to be flexible and open about what this means to you? Could you get fasinatingly curious about it?

It all started when i was about 23 i have a job in a warehouse packing lenses, i didnt mix with anyone, i could not have a Conversation with anyone i just felt the odd one out, people would just walk past me and cough loud it wasnt just one person doing this it was quite alot , ive had a few more jobs since then but the same happend again but worse, and i Could'nt cope with it anymore. I have stayed in for a 2 years now, every time i go to the shop or pop out people will stare at me and cough or sniff loud purpolsy as if to say there disgusted at me, and now ive notice people yawning when they see me as if to say youre boring or something may be its my personality but im a very shy person, i just dont know why.

 

[alllie]

hi roland
i identify with u
other people is the main problem of my sa- how they react when im around them- in fact i started a new topic here- does anyone think their nervousness makes others anxious
i notice people cough/ frown/yawn look anxious, i think cos im nervous they feel uncomfortable around me
do u agree or do u think they do this for another reason?????

 

[nickabcuk]

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[Roland]

Are there times when you ever see people cough, frown and yawn and you don't think it's because they're disgusted with you? That you think it's because they're tired, ill or stressed or something like that?

Thanks for your replys and support, I managed to go in a shop today i was in the cue to be served, and about ten people walk in and everyone of them yawned as they looked at me ,and one of them sort of laughed and yawn, its so Obvously that there doing it to me everybody does the same things, after i was served i walked back home and passed other 6 people and they looked at me and started coughing loud like they was going to be sick.

 

[nickabcuk]

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[Roland]

Are there times though when they're not doing it to you? When they cough or whatever for another reason?

yes there is times when i think there not doing it at me only when i know they havent seen me or noticed me, i see alot of people cough,sniff yawn, like if i was walking behind somebody and i know the havent seen me and when i heard them cough,sniff or yawn i wouldnt take any notice of it, sorry if this sounds strange to you

 

[nickabcuk]

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[Roland]

Believe me there are much stranger things out there. Anyway variety is the spice of life. It sounds like it's bothering you quite a bit, I assume that's why you posted here about it, is it? Would you like to change this part of your life? If so, would you like some help with changing it?

Yes i posted here because i didnt know what else to do, I would do anything to stop this happening to me or to find out what it all means ive had suicidal thoughts recently about this and would really like some help Thank you

 

[jerim]

i having the same problem with you ,but mine is some says it besides u when u buy food .Like what they may say ,we are misinterpreting but most of the time we are sure they are doing it to get to you.Just looking at the way they see u .. u just knew it right?

 

[nickabcuk]

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[Tigger26]

Not Crazy

Unspoken about true but very common today. One person most appropriately expressed it as bigotry lives in the 21st century. I've been searching the net for answers today and I've found the coughing labeled as 1. Fake Coughing or 2. Mock Coughing.

Since no studies have been done on it I've compiled a list of reactions and actions of people related to this coughing phenonema.

Fake Cough
-----------
* Condescending
* Passive-aggressive
* Lack of candor and open expression
* Passive-aggressive nonsense, the result of awkward, maladapted
people whose social abilities have withered in the era of gated
communities, armored isolation tanks (SUVs and the like), and
nonstop media pap reinforcing boorish behavior.
* Discriminatory
* Bigotry in the 21st century
* Used to drive away inquisitive outsiders
* To show annoyance
* Alternative to being candid about an offensive behavior

My conclusion of my unofficial study...

Fake coughing is a way of passive aggressively pushing your
agenda, letting someone know that they or something they are doing
is against the status quo (ie not cool, etc).