So I quit...sorta.

[jayBDee]

I have this office job for about 6 months. After trying my hardest I got several negative reviews. On my review they used words like "withdrawn" and "not willing to do what is necessary to succeed." I am sure they are reading my SA as me not giving a damn. So to be honest, I suck socially and at processing files. It's just not for me. The sad thing is that it actually paid decent. I am using up my vacation and then I am going to quit. I am nervous about quitting. It's kinda ruining my vacation because that's all I have been thinking about. I don't think it would be beneficial for me or them to stay. In my last review, I went from "marginal" to "unacceptable". So basically its only a matter of time before they fire me.

When I get employment somewhere else, do I put that they can contact my previous employer? What can my last corporate employer say about me? I heard from someone that they can only ask how long you were employed and if they would hire you again. Is this true?

I am not sure what to try next. I am not sure what I would be compatible with. I thought about volunteering to build my resume and get more experience but I really need the money/insurance. I took some career tests and they leave me feeling confused. I want to have a sense of purpose and not just a job. I don't have a social life or anything else going for me. Any suggestions? How do I find myself? I already went to college and I am still confused.

 

[marciaX3]

hi,

i've been where you are now... a year ago. i was starting to really lose it. i was crying at work after not even 5 mins of being there and just generally extra stressed b/c they were overworking me... so i thought it would be better for me and the kids (i worked at a daycare) if i left. it was getting to the point where my babies would smile at me and i had to struggle just to smile back... that was the last straw for me. plus, daycare is reputedly? one of the worst jobs you can have! (so true in many ways, not cuz of the kids but cuz of the management and HIGH as hell turnover). so after 1 1/2 yrs i quit, unfortunately as my last day got closer and closer, i was the mental case in the daycare so i was too late in quitting before i lost it... anyway, so i'm just saying that i can relate. it's a tough position to be in...

and yes, i heard the same thing that the previous employer can only answer those 2 questions and nothing else. i have yet to even try to get another job (i hate working and am avoiding it at all costs) so i can't personally confirm it, sorry. i'm scared to death of that process though. i know my last impressions on them were definitely bad where i'm the mental case, so who would really say they'd rehire a mental case?! at least, that's my thinking...

anyway, volunteering is a good way to build up your resume and also use that opportunity to build up your social skills and work skills without the penalty of being fired like at a job. so you could use this "transition time" to volunteer so you can improve yourself for your next job, ya know? and i understand that feeling of being confused after college. i graduated a few years ago with a degree in child studies and there's so many different things i'd like to do, but i only have maybe 60% of the skills needed for it, ya know? maybe the volunteering can help with that, or doing temp jobs so you can get a feel for what you might want to do most. just a couple ideas to hopefully help ya out...

 

[Angel_Of_Death]

I'm not exactly sure where your from, but what I can tell you is that for a contact or reference from your previous employer, you can make it up. Before I got my current job, they asked for 2 references from previous employers, my resume was already a lie...as jobs which I held for only months, I put in that I worked there for years. As for the 2 references, I gave them contact numbers of 2 of my friends, who did me the favor of pretending as they were my former managers....I eventually got the job.

If you don't wanna do like me. You could use a contact from someone at your workplace who already holds a "superior" position, who you feel you can trust. It doesn't necessarily have to be your boss. Just let them know that or ask the person if you could count on his to give you a good reference.

Hope this helps.

Oh, and as far as my own personal experience at work goes....I used to work full time, but I couldn't handle it because of SA. So I asked for part time, my hours got cut in half...but I still feel that at one point I might just quit because I can't hand all the social stress and anxiety. Thank god I got part time otherwise I would've already quit. It's a shame because I'm good at my job and it pays really well. Too bad people around me make me so damn anxious.

 

[jayBDee]

I would ask a friend to pretend that they are a former manager but I don't have anyone to ask. I sorta know one coworker at work. I don't think she would be comfortable making stuff up for me though. Hmmm.

Whatever I wind up doing I will have to start part-time. Full-time was too much exposure for me. Too bad that there wasn't a legitimate work-at-home option. If that was an option I would do that in addition to volunteering to get some exposure to the outside world.

 

[marciaX3]

that's the same kind of position i'm in... there's no way in hell i'd do full time again, at least not once i start working again. and unfortunately, i'll never work in another daycare again either, it destroyed me. if i was going to get a job, i was going to get one at the 24 hr CVS that's basically across the street from me. i'd work some off-peak shift so i wouldn't be dealing w/ people so much... even that though is too much for me right now. but do you think you would be ok with something like that? my therapist had suggested working as someone who stocks shelves instead of a cashier so i wouldn't have to deal w/ anyone...

for the last few months, i've been doing very minor work at home stuff where you can complete offers (more money) or do daily surveys (less money). if you (or anyone) would like the link and any info, let me know. i promise it's legit, i've already gotten checks that had no problem depositing. there's also a few other ideas i was going to do if i had the courage... if you have a car, you could do a groceries service for your neighbors (elderly, disabled, people who don't have the time, people who hate grocery shopping, moms with loud kids who avoid grocery shopping lol) and go grocery shopping for them or with them and bring their groceries to their home. i don't have a car or i would do this. or if you like/don't mind animals, you could do a pet service for people who are too busy and whatnot to walk their dogs or travel a lot so they need someone to pet sit. things like that. just a few ideas.

 

[jayBDee]

I might be able to do something at CVS during non-peak hours. I don't think I could do the cash register though. I think that would be worse than my last job. I thought it would be ideal to do some type of data entry job at home. I wouldn't mind even if the pay was modest. I am not sure about grocery delivery or pet care but I will keep that in mind. I am not sure if its worth while but I thought about going to a vocational rehabilitation place.

It would be nice to know what places offer insurance to their part-time employees. Medications and doctor visits account for a significant amount of my expenses. I read that Starbucks (don't think I could do that) offers insurance to its part timers.