school..

[Insight]

i cant take it anymore. bully's, so many of them, Ive had everything done to me, and im only in freshman year. and now, on Monday, they beat me too the point i was unconscious. i went threw counciling, that fuckface only made it worse, saying it was my 'posture' or something was wrong with me that made the bully's target me. i tried to turn to my religion, wow did that only make things worse, becoming an atheist helped me for a little while at least. I've tried to kill myself twice also. first time with pills, my parents returned home early so it couldn't work in time, and second time with a gun, but i couldn't do it...i wish i would have now. and of course, I've ask my asshole parents to take me out countless times, but they continually say 'no you can handle it' - and don't try to put the whole 'your parents are trying to help you' out here, my parents are sadistic drunk pricks and i was a mistake too begin with, my mom cheated on my dad and that's how i was born, thus, my dad hates me.

..yesterday, i had guns in my backpack..i had objects to block doorways to make them not be able to escape so i could kill them all slowly and painfully. especially the teachers...oh what delight i would get out of that, the fuckers only made things worse...half of them seen people hit me and just said "oh that's bad you shouldn't do that." but alas...nothing happened that day, i don't know if it was my posture..or what. no one said a word too me, not even the teachers, it was like they were afraid or something. i know in my mind that if something would have happened, i would have done it. i can truthfully say that.

i have 3 choices..shoot the fuckers, suicide, or too run away. im smart. i know i am, i don't try in school so i get horrid grades, but i know everything that they teach and well amounts more. i know these are my only choices. staying there would inevitably lead my to shooting them, and i cant get a withdrawn from it

i don't even really know why i typed this, its not like any of you can understand much less help my situation..

 

[Crayzorder]

Get out of there. Now.
If your too the point you almost caused a school shooting, you need to leave the school, immediately. Don't stay another day.
If your parents are seriously as bad as you say, you can leave them also, leave everything behind may be your best choice in this situation.
Handling bullies and teachers like this for 4 years will not work, trust me, i barely survived one year. I was thinking of school shootings also.
When i left everything i knew behind..my life became better, although i was poor and didn't have anywhere too turn too, i eventually came out of it and begun to grow back some stability and respect.
I'm still hurt too this day, though.

 

[weak]

..yesterday, i had guns in my backpack..i had objects to block doorways to make them not be able to escape so i could kill them all slowly and painfully. especially the teachers...oh what delight i would get out of that

FYI - when you make comments like this, the owner of this website has a legal obligation to report you to the police and hand over your IP.

 

[sabbath92003]

Drop out, study and take the GED test. I skipped high school, went to community college instead.

 

[Lexmark]

Do weights and martial arts ? I dunno
If you gonna shoot them make it about SP so it gets some media attention

 

[Elad]

Yeah, its funny until someone actually does it. =/

but weights and self defense[not shooting people ] sound like solid ideas just to get your confidence up and make you feel more empowered.

 

[Smokeringz]

i dunno dude, next time you go bring something sharp and poke the fuckers (not a knife just something sharp like a nail) or you can just beat the shit out of one 0f them when they arent looking.

 

[NormanBates]

..yesterday, i had guns in my backpack..i had objects to block doorways to make them not be able to escape so i could kill them all slowly and painfully. especially the teachers...oh what delight i would get out of that

FYI - when you make comments like this, the owner of this website has a legal obligation to report you to the police and hand over your IP.

I don't know man, the owners didn't seem to take action on those others here, do you think they would help on this thread?

I hope nobody is pinging in this situation

 

[Zappa111]

Hey dude. Listen to me. I have been through so much of the same stuff, ok, even though i am a girl.I have lived the nightmare. Blowing up stuff and shooting isn't going to benefit YOU. It's what they want, they want to make you angry. You're going to be crucified by the entire general public if you blow up stuff. After a few months people will forget who you were, and you may blow up people you don't mean to blow up anyway.

Look...maybe you can try to get a job somewhere far away?

I feel sad for you that they beat you up...it wasn't right at all. Look, try to see if you can live with a distant relative or get a job...these may be your only options.

If you can't go away...if you are stuck with these people...,

1)calm down
2)focus on your schoolwork, especially if you are intelligent anyway.
3)they want to distract you.
4)DON'T LOOK AT THEM. I don't know why its a psychological thing.
5)dress neatly and don't swear or talk to them no matter how bad they make you feel.

You can message me any time if you want to talk, ok? Follow my advice im an expert. and seeing yourself as a fighter, not a victim, is ESSENTIAL. It will make you feel stronger, if you go into victim mode you'll feel much worse.

God bless you young man

 

[Child of Fire and Air]

Hey man. I completly understand how badly it sucks. I've been thru a lot of the same shit. I've been beaten to unconciousness, I've attempted suicide, I've taken tons of bullying; for a few months in 4th grade, during recess, the majority of the kids would get me into a corner throw rocks that ranged in size from pea to golf ball at me... life just over all sucks. It just sucks more for some other people, like us. Now I don't have the same family problems that you do, but it's still hellish.
I'm sorry that all this is happening to you.

I noticed that you haven't replyed back on your forum, and that worries me, considering what you've said you want to do. So as a fellow bullied freshman, I'm asking you to talk to me about it. Cuz I know how I have gotten through this hell so far, and I want to try to help you through it as well. And if you don't want to talk to me, then at least post back on the forum to let me know that you're doing ok... or if it's not going ok, then at least you're surviving.

 

[nezul]

god your in a hard position, im sorry for you

now to help, iv been close to the point of suicide once and iv wanted to die, never tried to kill myself though but iv thought about it.

to solve your problem, its hard i know, but i hope your read this.

your are obviously being bullied for a reason, it might be cause your smarter than everone or something. im guessing that could be it, the biggest mistake you can make is trying to fight them (especially if there is more than one) and dont try to sound tough it just makes it more fun for them and they like to prove to you you dont stand a chance. it is so hard being were you are, iv been bullied cause im "weird" or because im stupid, hell im so stupid when i get into arguments i start to contradict myself and prove their point instead of my own.

i dont think a quick fix salution is possiple now, you are at rock bottom and its a long climb back up, here is my best salution to you

1. get good at something that will benifit your school or you bullies

I got good at running and became the best for my age, it also helped running from bullies and the such. gymanstics is great, try to find a class for your age, its makes you as strong as and ox and gives you a way to show it.

2. make as friends, if you have none make some, even if its just someone who dosent mind you, random acts of kindness do you and the world a good,

friends will usually help you if a bully comes up to you and they will never try to attack you if you have a couple of friends around (bullies judge their strength by their odds)

3. hold on, to anything, something, anything to keep you occupied or sane or happy

i chose computer games, made me a geek but as long as i had friends i was happy to be accepted by someone

4. one you have foothold on life dont let go, find what ticks the bullies off and try to stop it, again those random acts of kindness do good, dont be nice if they be dicks about your kindness, reward them for their kindness if they stop bullying you.

just be nice, and let them tower over you let them know they are in control but dont take physical punishment run away or move away.

5. accept it, they bully you, as long as they dont hurt you or beat you up its fine,

let them be what ever just let it go, be cool and just let them tease you, push you, trip you but just be cool (anything else run, just run)


try to enjoy life, there might not be much to enjoy but you only get one life and would be suck to go without leaving something behind.

and dont leave home, its the one place you should be able to find solitude.


be very careful with you actions because a school works like a pyramid and bullies are the bottom feeders, if you fall its hard to get back up, dobbing will drop you in the pyramid so try to refraim from doing it, sports are a great way to get high in it, look like a fool it cool trying still gets you some points and talking about computer games and the such will make you loose it.

my last point of advice and i REALLY hope i have helped at least a little.

someones strength is not measured on how they stand
its measures on the way they get up after falling down.

 

[nezul]

sorry im just not sure my last post made it thought im just testing something