Hey guys. I wanted to talk about my mind right now. I let a dog that I used to walk for a family friend lick my penis a few times. I also tried this with my own dog. I didn’t think anything of it; I was a horny hormonal kid who didn’t think before he acted. I didn’t even think of this event until about 6 months ago. I have bad OCD, and this memory of the event has stuck with me since. I feel sub-human, like a horrible person even though I have no interest in animals at all. In the present, I have a girlfriend and am doing well at a very good university. It just that this memory has been stuck on my mind and I can’t live a normal life because of it. I am always analyzing everything and comparing my experiences to others. I know there is a lot of people that practice this at an adult age, and even sometimes worse. I just wish that I could have a free, at peace mind, like I did before this memory resurfaced. I feel like my OCD is making this so much worse, and any normal person would just think “Wow I can’t believe I did that, that was so dumb, haha.” But all I can think is that I’m a bad person and don’t deserve love. I really like my girlfriend but now I feel like I don’t deserve to be happy with her. All I ever wanted was a serious girlfriend and now I have it, but now my mind seems like it wants to ruin it. It’s almost like I don’t want myself to be happy, but really, that’s all that I want. I think that’s why my thoughts have so much effect on me. I’m always trying to find closure to be happy but I can’t seem to live in the present. I really am a good person, but this memory overpowers all the good ones. I just really wish I could feel love, happiness, and just real emotion again. I feel like things will never be better and I’m destined to be miserable and depressed. Any help/appreciation would be great.