Quitting College

[stardog]

I really didn't want to do this,, I have tried for so long now to stick with this course but I just can't do it anymore. And I'm so dissapointed in myself right now. Problem is I have absolutely no idea what to do,, If I don't get a full-time job my mum will chuck me out of the house, I'll have nowhere else to go. This is, the worst thing to happen to me in my whole life and I'm prolly just gonna end up busking in the street or summat. Im no good at anything Bye-bye hopes and dreams

Sorry, just had to vent somehow. I'm panicking like s*** at the mo

 

[stardog]

wow thanks guys. To be honest I wasn't expecting any replies

I was taking AS's last year, got 3 C's, but kinda dropped out towards the end (making it impossible to go onto A-Levels this year, stupuid me) so this year I'm doing a national diploma in IT, a 2-year course :/ I really hate the course so far I find it veery boring,, and what makes it worse is that my sa is worse than ever, I don't talk to ANYONE (much worse than last year), and the rest of the class is really social and chatty. This drives me insane..really gets me down. I'm obviously known as the 'loner' now which I really don't want to be

I get up every morning and get the strongest sense of dread, I can't stand the thought of going in, well today I gave in and it's one of many absences Ive had, I think the college is getting sick of me now anyway they would probably be glad to see me go (after dropping out last year as well) My teacher doesn't like me much she always gives me cold stares :?

So yeah, I dunno what to do but I can't carry on like this for another 1 and a half years. Things would just get worse, and worse

 

[Snowcrash]

Yikes, I am in a rush - running late for work


But quick thoughts -

Different courses, different teachers, different major, different school?

Do they have any sort of guidance couselor sort of people at this school? Sometimes you might have options you don't even know about till you ask - yeah I know, the asking can be hard....

Cause yeah, finishing some sort of degree is going to give you way more options down the road.

 

[Skyla]

i say if you dont like your course move on. so many times alot of people just stick with something because they become too complacent. sometimes theres the "its too late...to much hassell" etc etc. but you are young. if you dont like it, move on and do something you do like before you look on after two whole years and realise what a waste it was/is.
when you move on, it'll give you a chance to start fresh. you dont have to worry about that silly teacher wid da cold stares or the chatty people in your class. in your new college or course, no one will know you so you can try and start learning to be more out there again.
is college the only form of socialisation you have? then i suggest change the course, start at a new college. theres nothing worse than having SA and going to a college which you hate. Of course you'll feel dread when you wake up in the morning.

 

[sammiey]

i think if it is something which you want to do as a career stay at it. i have just finished a fashion course this year which i did for two years i spent the whole two years having no friends in the course and not speaking to anyone i just focused on my work and doing my best. so many times i wanted to leave but i stayed until the end and now i have my qualification and am able to dressmake which is great and one day will hpefully work for myself. But i think you should stay and finish it for your self you will feel so glad you did not quit and then you can have a job in something you really enjoy.

 

[Chilling__Echo]

hey stardog

this semester i've been hit with depression and i think i've fucked up this semester really bad. i was hoping to go to grad schoo, and my first year i had all mostly As and Bs. now i just hope i pass.

but i do plan on talking to my advisors and teachers, they'll understand if you have a legit reason (which you do), don't quit just yet, think it out, there's other options out there. don't make any decisions until you've seen all your options

 

[carebear]

I can totally relate on this one. in most of my classes, i begin with talking to everyone, then I get really quiet towards the end for some reason. I have a hard time keeping relationships going in classes.
One reason is that I know I probably won't keep in touch with anyone, another reason is that I just don't want to put myself out there for fear of being judged as stupid, or even smart. I don't want people to judge me at all. Judgement scares me.

I had to drop out of school for a while. Now I am going back to be a pharmacist! I have a couple more pre-reqs to go!!

good luck stardog in whatever you choose to do!
ps. what is "summat"??

-cb (http://www.lonelyclubber.com) 8O

 

[renegade]

Hi, stardog, let me give you some advice from my own experience.

I'm now 2nd year, college, just came out of a severe depression in summer. First week I managed to go to classes, but things became preety bad by the end of it. Like you said, the thought of being uncapable of socializing and with the other chatty and outgoing coleagues drived me insane and I was losing it. Not to mention the anxiety.

So I decided to quit, it was 2 much, after 13 years of giving my best to fight SA and socialize with my class mates and not succeding I decided it's really no use to keep trying.

I asked myself what's the use of education ? I answerd that I need it to get a job I want in the future, to make money and to live happy. I always was a grade A student, even got a schoolarship after the first semester of 1st year in college, but I was a loner and had like 2 coleagues to witch I rarely talked. I was school smart, but not street smart.

I thought that if I'm gonna be like this for the rest of my life, how can I find happiness and joy in life, even with lots of money, a house of my one, but alone with no friends and with no one to care for. At that time I didn't knew something like SP existed. So I lost all interest in life and I couldn't find a good reason to keep going.

So I quit school start searching the internet for all kind of shit, a cure for shyness, hell, even painless s*icide methods, anything. And I found all kind of stuff, and finnally I found the term Social Phobia as a medically recognized mental disorder. I was so relifed, so during this mini holiday I reservd to myself to read all I could of this ''disease''.

So, loner, now I'm back in school after 2-3 weeks of staying locked in my room (but it looks like the teachers are on strike for the moment). You should take a time to think, education is VERY important for everyone. If you will cure SA at one time in your life, you would wonder: ok, now i'm SA free, not 100 %, but I can socialize, but what about my education ? Who would take the chance of hiring me ? Will he choose someone with studies or someone without ?

I've put all my hopes in meds and I wish I can go on with my life, step by step. I know you're going through a not so good moment, but the time to finish your school is NOW, later it will me harder. I don't know if you're taking any meds or therapy, but if you don't, you should consider it. Another choise is to change schools.

Good luck and don't lose hope. :wink:

 

[stardog]

Thankyou guys so much for the support!!

I talked with my mum today, she thinks I should get an office job, I don't think thats the right thing to do though as I want a career, something I can be in control of myself. I also mentioned I really wanted a career in music (something I'm really passionate about) and she said I was being silly and had my head in the clouds basically That knocked me a bit

I suppose I should just go back into college and sit it out, at least till the end of this term. I mostly just feel embarassed now going back in, I've already missed an appointment with the head of year about my many absences for the past few weeks, and the teachers are wondering what the hell I'm doing, it's really awkward. I've missed tons of work too...I think they're probably hoping I am leaving by this point

I think I'm gonna go in tomorrow, just nervous as I don't know what to expect :?