Youg
Member
I need some help I guess. Things aren’t going too smoothly with my mental state the last few months. I want to discuss it here and maybe some people have some tips. The problem is really frustrating and it’s interfering with my life. I just looked at my room, and it’s a big mess. I stopped going to the gym three times a week and now only go once… Still discussing this with my psychologist (older man) doesn’t seem to help at all, and maybe discussing it here will help me more.
I'm a 26 year old male and I have OCD for many many years. Only the last one and a half year things have really changed for the worst. Where I used to only have an obsession for once or twice a year, I now have it non-stop.
I won’t bother you with the first year, but since October…. Okay here comes the weird part……. I have these problems with trying to avoid clothes or things owned by older women. Okay, that didn’t sound very well. :S Let’s start at the beginning: I posted this before, but when I first experienced this feeling I was about 8 or 9 years old: my grandmother came and baby-sit my little brother and me once a week. In the afternoon she sometimes took a nap in me or my brother’s bed. How my brother felt about it, I don’t know. I, for some reason, couldn't handle it at all.
Before I continue, I don't know how many older women are reading this, but I don't want to offend them. I love my mom and grandma like you can't believe it and every day I get more fond of my girlfriends mother. I don't hate older women. My psychologist thinks it has something to do with the fear of older women interfering with my manlyhood....
This feeling came back about three/four months ago. My girlfriend, who stays at my place a few days a week, has no problem at all with sharing clothes. She, her sisters and mother share, where possible, scarves, boots, sweaters, I dunno what else. I don’t mind it when she is wearing my clothes like boxers, tank tops, sweaters, t-shirts etc., but whenever this comes in contact with clothes her mother could have wore, it pretty much disgusts me and I want to throw these clothes away. I don’t know why! I don’t hate older women. :S Maybe it’s something “Oedipussy”. Some unconscious fear where contact with older women, in any form, especially with my mother and my GF’s mother, should be avoided. Even their clothes.
I give some examples to explain how extreme things have gone:
- My girlfriend brought a bathing wrap she owned for many years, from her parents place to my place. Because I know she shares things like shoes, boots, scarves etcetera, where possible, with her mother I also have the strange feeling her mother could’ve borrowed/wore this bathing wrap from her sometimes. I don’t know whether or not this is true, but even the possibility makes me avoid this bathing wrap at any cost. Like this morning my GF wore a tank top of me (which I don’t mind at all) and later when making breakfast she wore her bathing wrap over this tank top. I now just want to thrown away the tank top! Like it’s tainted forever and I can’t even wash it out.
- My girlfriends parents gave me a second hand chair a few months ago. I thought it was just always her dad’s lazy chair. When I heard it used to be her grandmothers chair I didn’t want to use, or own it and gave it away.
- I left my scarf at my parents place a few weeks ago. Because I know my mother has this thing for scarves and owns a million scarves I felt like she could’ve borrowed mine for the time it was at their place. Although I’m not sure this happened and probably only happened in my mind I don’t want to wear this scarf anymore.
- Pillows that I used for more than 5 years I threw away, because I felt they were much older than that and could’ve been used by my mom before that.
- Sweaters my GF lend from me and took home, I don’t want to wear anymore, because there could’ve been a possibility that her mom borrowed that sweater from her.
- A poncho, my GF’s mother made for her has been in my backpack. Now I feel like I can’t put my gym-clothes in that backpack anymore, because they will be “tainted”.
Aaaahh, I can go on and on and on. Last few months, I gave away a perfect good chair only because it used to be owned by an older woman. I threw away pillows and backpacks, bought new ones. I washed my clothes, bed, myself and my hands many many times, even when it wasn’t necessary. I stopped wearing/using shoes, shawls, jackets, rain coats, sweaters, tank tops, backpacks etc, only because they came or could’ve come in contact with and older women or her clothes.
And when I do just wear those clothes I feel I can’t wear anymore, I get this extreme urge to just wash myself from head to toe and wash or throw away these clothes. It just feels dirty. Like I wore second hand clothes that used to be owned by granny’s. :S
It prevents me from functioning normally, it costs a lot of money and it basically sucks.
I just want to discuss things here. I know many people are not fond of second hand clothes but I’m wondering if people have this problem as extreme as I do. Would you also throw away/wash these clothes the way I do? Do you have similar issues or not at all? Do you have any tips to solve this? Basically, I’m just curious how people here would handle in these situations. Would you care at all? Wash it? Throw it away?
I want to solve this problem, but I don't know how. Everytime I do wear clothes I feel are "contaminated" I get this dirty feeling. Like I'm covered in mud and need to wash my body and wash or throw away these clothes. I basically get this very uncomfortable feeling which makes me feel horrible and make me lose all form of happiness and joy. Still giving in to this fear and continue avoiding, throwing away and buying clothes is extremely tiring, costs a lot of time and money and it only gets worse and worse and worse.
If anybody can give me some advice on how to solve this, please do. Thank you.
I'm a 26 year old male and I have OCD for many many years. Only the last one and a half year things have really changed for the worst. Where I used to only have an obsession for once or twice a year, I now have it non-stop.
I won’t bother you with the first year, but since October…. Okay here comes the weird part……. I have these problems with trying to avoid clothes or things owned by older women. Okay, that didn’t sound very well. :S Let’s start at the beginning: I posted this before, but when I first experienced this feeling I was about 8 or 9 years old: my grandmother came and baby-sit my little brother and me once a week. In the afternoon she sometimes took a nap in me or my brother’s bed. How my brother felt about it, I don’t know. I, for some reason, couldn't handle it at all.
Before I continue, I don't know how many older women are reading this, but I don't want to offend them. I love my mom and grandma like you can't believe it and every day I get more fond of my girlfriends mother. I don't hate older women. My psychologist thinks it has something to do with the fear of older women interfering with my manlyhood....
This feeling came back about three/four months ago. My girlfriend, who stays at my place a few days a week, has no problem at all with sharing clothes. She, her sisters and mother share, where possible, scarves, boots, sweaters, I dunno what else. I don’t mind it when she is wearing my clothes like boxers, tank tops, sweaters, t-shirts etc., but whenever this comes in contact with clothes her mother could have wore, it pretty much disgusts me and I want to throw these clothes away. I don’t know why! I don’t hate older women. :S Maybe it’s something “Oedipussy”. Some unconscious fear where contact with older women, in any form, especially with my mother and my GF’s mother, should be avoided. Even their clothes.
I give some examples to explain how extreme things have gone:
- My girlfriend brought a bathing wrap she owned for many years, from her parents place to my place. Because I know she shares things like shoes, boots, scarves etcetera, where possible, with her mother I also have the strange feeling her mother could’ve borrowed/wore this bathing wrap from her sometimes. I don’t know whether or not this is true, but even the possibility makes me avoid this bathing wrap at any cost. Like this morning my GF wore a tank top of me (which I don’t mind at all) and later when making breakfast she wore her bathing wrap over this tank top. I now just want to thrown away the tank top! Like it’s tainted forever and I can’t even wash it out.
- My girlfriends parents gave me a second hand chair a few months ago. I thought it was just always her dad’s lazy chair. When I heard it used to be her grandmothers chair I didn’t want to use, or own it and gave it away.
- I left my scarf at my parents place a few weeks ago. Because I know my mother has this thing for scarves and owns a million scarves I felt like she could’ve borrowed mine for the time it was at their place. Although I’m not sure this happened and probably only happened in my mind I don’t want to wear this scarf anymore.
- Pillows that I used for more than 5 years I threw away, because I felt they were much older than that and could’ve been used by my mom before that.
- Sweaters my GF lend from me and took home, I don’t want to wear anymore, because there could’ve been a possibility that her mom borrowed that sweater from her.
- A poncho, my GF’s mother made for her has been in my backpack. Now I feel like I can’t put my gym-clothes in that backpack anymore, because they will be “tainted”.
Aaaahh, I can go on and on and on. Last few months, I gave away a perfect good chair only because it used to be owned by an older woman. I threw away pillows and backpacks, bought new ones. I washed my clothes, bed, myself and my hands many many times, even when it wasn’t necessary. I stopped wearing/using shoes, shawls, jackets, rain coats, sweaters, tank tops, backpacks etc, only because they came or could’ve come in contact with and older women or her clothes.
And when I do just wear those clothes I feel I can’t wear anymore, I get this extreme urge to just wash myself from head to toe and wash or throw away these clothes. It just feels dirty. Like I wore second hand clothes that used to be owned by granny’s. :S
It prevents me from functioning normally, it costs a lot of money and it basically sucks.
I just want to discuss things here. I know many people are not fond of second hand clothes but I’m wondering if people have this problem as extreme as I do. Would you also throw away/wash these clothes the way I do? Do you have similar issues or not at all? Do you have any tips to solve this? Basically, I’m just curious how people here would handle in these situations. Would you care at all? Wash it? Throw it away?
I want to solve this problem, but I don't know how. Everytime I do wear clothes I feel are "contaminated" I get this dirty feeling. Like I'm covered in mud and need to wash my body and wash or throw away these clothes. I basically get this very uncomfortable feeling which makes me feel horrible and make me lose all form of happiness and joy. Still giving in to this fear and continue avoiding, throwing away and buying clothes is extremely tiring, costs a lot of time and money and it only gets worse and worse and worse.
If anybody can give me some advice on how to solve this, please do. Thank you.
