da3883
New member
Hey everyone. Wow it's nice to know that i'm not alone. I'm a 25 yr old male and i'm pretty sure I have had SA since about 18 or 19 yrs old now. I think it stems from my insecurity about myself. I noticed when I was around 18 yrs old everyone else around me started treating me differently. I think, and I know this might sound stupid, it was because I hit puberty late and I have a shorter stature than the average guy. When everyone else looked and acted like they were 20, I still looked like a 15 yr old. Seems like people couldn't "relate" to me anymore. I am still a little insecure about my height, but I think after 6 yrs of SA, it's a little more now than just my physical insecurity. I am so used to avoiding social situations now that it's normal to sit home on a FRI or SAT night. Thank god me and my girlfriend both work a lot and are always tired, making us too tired to go out, but that will not last forever. Sooner or later she is going to want to go out and socialize like normal people. I think that's why my last relationship failed. SA really puts a damper on one's self-being and it would be nice to find ways to overcome it. I guess I am finally starting to realize that it is a problem that is affecting all aspects of my life...work, relationship,ect. I guess what REALLY made me realize this was what happened yesterday. I had to go to an all day class that my boss signed me up for. The first thing that we had to do was go around the room and introduce ourselves and tell a little bit about ourselves. I almost choked on my own spit when it was my turn, which then made me feel real uncomfortable, more than when I first got their. Then, we had to do individual role-playing excersises in front of the class...numerous times. And when it came close to being my turn, my heart started racing, hands started sweating, was totally losing my train of thought. I could even see my heart beating through my shirt. When it was my turn, I always lost my train of thought and sometimes almost "blacked out" if you will, when I was speaking. I almost left the class due to my SA, but if I did that I'm pretty sure my boss would be pissed about it. At the end of the day, I was sooo relieved to leave that situation, and was mentally spent as well. There is no reason why a person should feel like this. I guess this is why I am here. It's a relief to know that other people might feel the same way that I do and maybe some of you have some pointers/advice that has helped you in the past. Nice to meet you all. 
