My grandfather's cure for his SA

[Klaus]

My grandfather used to be a social phobic from 1940 till 1970 (10 to 30 years old), he said to me that he couldn't use the phone because he didn't know when to speak and he used to speak at the wrong time!
And he used to be very ashamed of everything.

His father was very poor and he didn't have even shoes, so at Winter time he used to piss at his cold feet not to froze because of the snow, while waiting for his teacher to arrive at school.
And all students used to laugh at him. He said to me that he couldn't look people at the eyes.

When the 2ww came, he had to work all day making clothes, he used to be a taylor.

He had a job and he didn't need to speak with anyone, a social phobic's perfect life.

He was fine with that for a year, but not more.

Because he couldn't stand working so hard and being so fucking poor, he told me that every night of the Winter he and his brothers needed to drink almost pure alcohol to sleep because of the cold, without that they would be shaking awaked until morning.

So when thw war ended he went to the "big city" with all his Social Phobia screaming at him, and he had only one thought in mind. The thought that he would be so rich, that he would give all food and heat that his family needed.

He earned money from year to year, and ten years later, he could take all his family from poverty.

And he said to me that maybe social phobia isn't such a bad thing.
He said to me:
"If you could focus all your despair, sadness and angry at one thing that you really want from life! You will simple get it, it couldn't be different! But I've never tried to fix SA! I was cured I don't know how."

I think we have just too much comfort.

 

[Walk]

ahh, the paradox that is life.

Sometimes it's the shit in life and getting over it that makes us who we are. I hear this all the time.

Good post.

 

[JonnyD]

hell of a story! where he lived / live?

i like the way he told you because he spoke to you telling that you can achieve it! and he's right!

my pareents used to speak to me when i was younger about how lucky i was that i don't had to go on barefoot to school and have a shower, and a lot of very sad histories about poverty...

I think it's valid but they always incited me to feel ashamed, so i did! a rether patetic aspect of this "trauma" is that today i cant help to feel ashamed of having money (not that i dispose of much, but i do get paid fairly well to someone my age)

i also like that he tell how screwed he was, and he still found the motivation to win, he could have suicided , he could had gave up, but he choose to fight and he won

maybe i'm exagerating but you should suggest him to write a book ...

 

[Helyna]

It's great to hear this! It sometimes feels like we're the first generation to have SAD, since so few people knew about it before.

 

[Andrew]

I think we have just too much comfort.

This is very very true. Humans and modern society do not go together at all. Modern society is all about extreme comfort and safety-nets, yet the place we evolved from was completely different. This is why I hate government initiatives that try to make everything safe and sanitary.

Many people here are scared to get a job because of the social interaction, but trust me, when you need one to survive, you will get one. The problem is, many of us do not need one that much. I kind of wish my parents just gave me a deadline to leave the house and if I didn't I would be on the street.

Without motivation, it is hard to overcome our greatest fears. That is why I think trying to remove any safety-nets and develop strong goals in my life are important.

 

[Andrew]

It reminds me of when I was on a survival camp. My old school runs this camp that goes for a month and people just put into the bush (Australia) and have to co-operative and interact to survive. There is literally nowhere to hide. The first week was HELL. It was literally hell on earth. After that I had the best time I have ever had in my life to this day. By the end I was much more confident and relaxed. Unfortunately, returning to normal school life meant slipping back into old habits.

 

[dzerklis]

i was kinda disappointed with this story, i hoped to hear of some new way of dealing with SA but in the end it turned out its just a story of poverty that leads to low self esteem that leads to SA. and money is the cure. unfortunately its not as simple as that for most social phobics.

 

[Walk]

i was kinda disappointed with this story, i hoped to hear of some new way of dealing with SA but in the end it turned out its just a story of poverty that leads to low self esteem that leads to SA. and money is the cure. unfortunately its not as simple as that for most social phobics.

Cool signature. I checked it out.

THANKS.