SocialRetahd
Well-known member
.....
I'm going to become that guy everyone likes
- Thread starter SocialRetahd
- Start date
SocialRetahd
Well-known member
Cancelled.
SilentType
Banned
If only it was possible. I'll always be the guy that, for the most part, speaks only when spoken to. I can't keep a relationship strong with friends and family, and I won't even bring up my relationships with the opposite sex (there are none anymore). Sometimes I just think if I lived somewhere that nobody knows me I'd be so much happier. I'll probably test that theory one day only to find out that once again I'm going to live the rest of my life as a slave to social phobia...
Peace
Peace
Vancouver
Well-known member
SocialRetahd said:
You can't push it into happening overnight, yo. In fact, this one could very well take you a few months or even a few years to achieve. I used to think i could be that person... then I realized - I think I like me the way I am.
So maybe you don't necessarily need to become a people-pleaser just to gain acceptance, no? I think there's other ways. Get creative and come up with things you can do without completely revamping your style of living. Trust me, it works!
scissorhands
Well-known member
SilentType said:
I'm living that theory right now. I moved to a large city to get away thinking I could start fresh. It worked for short while then came back stronger then ever. You can't outrun your fears you have to face them and I'm now realizing that.
SilentType
Banned
Vancouver,
The reason moving away is so appealing to me is that so I can live away from all of the places and people that have turned my life into such a wreck. If I never have to see anybody again that knew "the old me" (before social phobia), then I won't have to live up to those expectations of me. I am aware that I will still have problems socially, but that's an ongoing struggle anyways. I just know that I'd be more comfortable without all the problems that come from seeing people that I "used to know." I'm only 19 years old, so it's a great time to start a new life somewhere else anyways. Being on my own will force me to get out and do the things necessary to survive. I'm sure there would be somewhat of an emptiness left in my life after I've been away from my family for a while, but if you knew my situation, you'd agree that I'd definitely be better off without the majority of them in my life anyways.
Peace
The reason moving away is so appealing to me is that so I can live away from all of the places and people that have turned my life into such a wreck. If I never have to see anybody again that knew "the old me" (before social phobia), then I won't have to live up to those expectations of me. I am aware that I will still have problems socially, but that's an ongoing struggle anyways. I just know that I'd be more comfortable without all the problems that come from seeing people that I "used to know." I'm only 19 years old, so it's a great time to start a new life somewhere else anyways. Being on my own will force me to get out and do the things necessary to survive. I'm sure there would be somewhat of an emptiness left in my life after I've been away from my family for a while, but if you knew my situation, you'd agree that I'd definitely be better off without the majority of them in my life anyways.
Peace
Butterflies
Well-known member
Hi Silent type - sorry for "butting" in - just wanted to say -
Great move to push the negative people out of your life.
But moving will not help social phobia - I have done it already (more than once). I remember - beleiving that I will never have to see all these people again so I am free. YIPEE I was FREE! I got this fantastic feeling of a big load lifted from my shoulders. So it did work ... for a while....
Until... bang! It started again. Just with different people and different situations.
So if you are not already doing something to change the way you view SP and change the way you think and act - start now. Yeah make the change but start making some other changes.
I am 33 years old - I kept running from my fears until I decided to make some real changes.
Good luck with your journey
Great move to push the negative people out of your life.
But moving will not help social phobia - I have done it already (more than once). I remember - beleiving that I will never have to see all these people again so I am free. YIPEE I was FREE! I got this fantastic feeling of a big load lifted from my shoulders. So it did work ... for a while....
Until... bang! It started again. Just with different people and different situations.
So if you are not already doing something to change the way you view SP and change the way you think and act - start now. Yeah make the change but start making some other changes.
I am 33 years old - I kept running from my fears until I decided to make some real changes.
Good luck with your journey
Horatio
Well-known member
Moving away and starting afresh won't solve the problem
But it can help in a big way depending on circumstance. The world is a cruel place and people with low confidence or/and socialphobia can often find themselves in unhealthy relationships (not just boy/gurl but friendships or family or work too)
Weak people attract people who wish to take advantage. Sometimes the people around you are determined to keep you down in order to inflate their own egos. By leaving town at a drop of a hat then you can sometimes escape those situations, which in turn can help you break free.
But it can help in a big way depending on circumstance. The world is a cruel place and people with low confidence or/and socialphobia can often find themselves in unhealthy relationships (not just boy/gurl but friendships or family or work too)
Weak people attract people who wish to take advantage. Sometimes the people around you are determined to keep you down in order to inflate their own egos. By leaving town at a drop of a hat then you can sometimes escape those situations, which in turn can help you break free.