IM and mail problems

[vitalis]

Does anyone else hate or feel uncomfortable with Instant Messaging? I'm noticing that since my social phobia is advancing; two or three years ago I had no problem but since then it has progressively dropped until February/March of that year that I haven't touched MSN.

I mean, I read a lot of your posts when you say that you IM and all, and I guess this is the only way for us to relate with other people out of forums so that must be not bad, but I've really lost the interest on it, or even worst, I'm a bit afraid of it.

I've been thinking about it and I conclude that in earlier stages of my social phobia I just had a big problem with shyness so it was difficult to talk to people "face to face" so I take refuge into this, but now that I'm a lot worst I've even lost interest to communicate to other people. And this hasn't been the only thing that I've noticed; before, when I saw that I had a new mail message I was something like excited because it was the only way to communicate to others (penpals basically), but now I feel afraid to open them. Sometimes my messages can last unread for a week or more because I don't dare to open them, or even worst, I don't reply them because I feel bad. the funny thing is that most of the times are just ads.

So, does anyone else have those problems?

 

[vitalis]

Damn, I knew I was strange but not that much... :lol:

 

[nemasket]

I have the same problem - but IMing and even emails have always made me nervous. I think it's some SAD-perfectionism combination, where I feel I have to say everything perfectly or else I'll be rejected or fail somehow (especially work-related). The pressure is especially bad on IM because you can't take that much time I often don't log on, even though I want to, if I don't feel up to it.

I've literally spent over a half hour writing an email I considered "important", and I sometimes have a fear of opening emails if there's some chance (in my mind) that something could be critical of something I send before.

So it's not just you

 

[NubCake]

Talking on the internet in forms such as IM, email, and forums is not much of a problem for me. It allows me time to think of what I want to say, where in real life you cannot go AFK..

With that said, I do have problem talking to random people I don't know on IM. Sometime's this is true for PM's too. If I don't know what to say.. I don't bother msg'ing the person back.

 

[vitalis]

OK, IM and in general Internet communication let's you time to think about the answer so it can be good for people having our problem, and it's obvious that there are different kinds and levels of anxiety as Lea said; I personally tend to relate with other people by forums and not IM and so, because I feel the same like nemasket said; it must be the perfectionism level who intervenes here. Actually, I use to spend a lot of time writing and thinking about what I write and the reaction that others may have when reading that in most of the forums (like this) I have a low number of posts but I've really written something like 80-100. :roll:

Anyway, if anyone has more experiences about it, it'd be nice to share them.