IcarusUnderWater2
Banned
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I suck at convo. I Repeat the same thing all the time etcetc
- Thread starter IcarusUnderWater2
- Start date
slicenrice
Well-known member
i have the same problem man, and i feel your pain there. i have had decent conversations with girls and then not known what to do next, so i just never see them again.
what i think is best is to say something like "maybe i can give you some help on writing it if you would like" or be direct and ask her if she wants to meet up sometime, maybe by switching the conversation to things she likes.
ex:
her: yeah i am procrastinating so much on this essay.
you: i know its so hard to do it with so many distractions. yesterday i was lucky to finish it because it was such a nice day out.
her: yeah it was beautiful out
you: so what types of things do you do on beautiful days like yesterday?
her: my fav things are tennis and softball
you: i love tennis, do you want to play sometime. lets exchange numbers.
or
you: ive never tried tennis. maybe you can show me the ropes. can i get your number?
im not great at that type of stuff, but thats how i would try and handle it. next time you see her in class or whatever try and chat about that sort of thing.
best of luck.
what i think is best is to say something like "maybe i can give you some help on writing it if you would like" or be direct and ask her if she wants to meet up sometime, maybe by switching the conversation to things she likes.
ex:
her: yeah i am procrastinating so much on this essay.
you: i know its so hard to do it with so many distractions. yesterday i was lucky to finish it because it was such a nice day out.
her: yeah it was beautiful out
you: so what types of things do you do on beautiful days like yesterday?
her: my fav things are tennis and softball
you: i love tennis, do you want to play sometime. lets exchange numbers.
or
you: ive never tried tennis. maybe you can show me the ropes. can i get your number?
im not great at that type of stuff, but thats how i would try and handle it. next time you see her in class or whatever try and chat about that sort of thing.
best of luck.
whatever12
Member
I have the same problem. I'm in college too...and feel your pain. I have a hard time making friends. I don't make friends that easily. People usually have to come up to me first. I have no social skills whatsoever. All I think about is how I'm going to talk when the next person starts talking to me ..or if I talk to someone during the day how the words are going to come out. The more I talk the better I can talk to people...its so true. My social skill are fine when I have friends that I can trust and talk to. I have a hard time figuring out if people like me or not..I don't have the sense to pick up on that sort of stuff. If I were you..I wouldin't worry about it..go to her dorm or whatever and ask her if she would like to do something this weekend. What do you have to lose..being rejected...if I where you I would take the chance to see if the girl wants to be friends with me or not..instead of caring about being what I've said to her and not speak to her again. If she said hi to you..talked to you...she probably wants to be your friend as well.. she was probably wondering if you liked her or not too. So go talk to her now
Good luck!
Good luck!
whatever12
Member
In class I assume that most of the students in my class don't care to talk to me..like me. I assume they think I'm too boring, quiet, weird. I'm friends with this one person that is weird like me in class. Where the most weird..socially awkward people in class lol:/ We are good friends...so you should find someone in your classes that you can relate to. Find someone thats socially awkward too..I dont know..I've been seeing that I become more socially awkward chilling with people who dont have social skills either..I would like to be normal again, I used to be normal..hangout with people that are normal ...the socially awkward ones..including myself seem to be the ones that are the worst ..or the best of friends..the worst ones which you should stay away from are really distant, are into really weird stuff like playing dungeons and dragons..i have some friends that play that..i think its weird..too wierd..I'm a good socially awkward friends..trustworthy always there for you friend.. that actually wants to chat w/ friends ..wants to do hangout at places other than people's houses to play internet/video games..I rather chat with people than just spend time with people..you know what i mean. :roll:
bleach
Banned
Yeah, I hate all that boring "nice weather we're having, huh?" type of small talk bullshit that passes for conversation until you get to know someone decently well. But on the other hand, maybe I just think I hate it because I'm anxious and want an excuse to avoid it?? 8O 8O 8O 8O 8O
seekeroftruth
Well-known member
...
I do the same thing:
"hey"
"how's it going"
"what's up"
later on in the day pass the same person:
"what's up man"
or "how's it goin"
or
"hey"
or someone makes a comment about something:
"yah"
or just reiterate what they said in a different way, stopping the conversation in it's tracks.
I'm real clever that way.
I do the same thing:
"hey"
"how's it going"
"what's up"
later on in the day pass the same person:
"what's up man"
or "how's it goin"
or
"hey"
or someone makes a comment about something:
"yah"
or just reiterate what they said in a different way, stopping the conversation in it's tracks.
I'm real clever that way.
Social_Moth
Active member
Re: ...
Yeaa bro. I'm the exact same way.
It's funny though, I've realized there's a tiny, little bit of anxiety that every kind of social situation induces... even in fairly confident people. Everyone has a few nervous habits/weird things they do when they're put on the spot. But what pushes our emotions so far over the edge to make us what we are? I'm so fascinated by it, yet I live it. I'm like my own guinea pig in some weird experiment!
seekeroftruth said:
Yeaa bro. I'm the exact same way.
It's funny though, I've realized there's a tiny, little bit of anxiety that every kind of social situation induces... even in fairly confident people. Everyone has a few nervous habits/weird things they do when they're put on the spot. But what pushes our emotions so far over the edge to make us what we are? I'm so fascinated by it, yet I live it. I'm like my own guinea pig in some weird experiment!
Angel_Of_Death
Well-known member
I relate and I feel the pain...
dpr
Well-known member
Re: I suck at convo. I Repeat the same thing all the time et
I know that can be hard and I have the same problem. I feel bad/guilty when I really have to be somewhere or do something important, but I'm in the middle of a convo. Like if I have to catch a bus or something. But remember, you don't have to slink off... you could have just told the truth, like
"Well I hate to cut this short, but I have to get this essay in before the office closes. Good luck on your paper! See you around!"
or you could just "realize" you're late... look at your watch or ask her what time it is and then be like "Oh shit! They close the office in ten minutes! I have to hand in my essay, I'll talk to you later."
But don't let the convo with her go to waste. You've already got an easy follow-up so make sure you talk to her again. Next time you see her...
"So how did your essay work out?"
IcarusUnderWater2 said:
I know that can be hard and I have the same problem. I feel bad/guilty when I really have to be somewhere or do something important, but I'm in the middle of a convo. Like if I have to catch a bus or something. But remember, you don't have to slink off... you could have just told the truth, like
"Well I hate to cut this short, but I have to get this essay in before the office closes. Good luck on your paper! See you around!"
or you could just "realize" you're late... look at your watch or ask her what time it is and then be like "Oh shit! They close the office in ten minutes! I have to hand in my essay, I'll talk to you later."
But don't let the convo with her go to waste. You've already got an easy follow-up so make sure you talk to her again. Next time you see her...
"So how did your essay work out?"
dan_e
Well-known member
I find that practicing conversation out loud to myself helps. Since you'll probably be running into this girl again, you already have a target. Practice aloud as if you were talking to her. Talk about all different topics and try to envision her responses. Something like this:
Hey, I didn't mean to cut you off the other day. I had to hand my essay in before the office closed. So, how'd things go with your essay?
(she talks)
If you ever need help with something like that again let me know. I'm pretty good at that kind of stuff.
(she talks)
So what are you up to today?
(she talks)
Do you want to hang out later?
Good luck! Let us know how it works out.
Hey, I didn't mean to cut you off the other day. I had to hand my essay in before the office closed. So, how'd things go with your essay?
(she talks)
If you ever need help with something like that again let me know. I'm pretty good at that kind of stuff.
(she talks)
So what are you up to today?
(she talks)
Do you want to hang out later?
Good luck! Let us know how it works out.