i hate myself for feeling like this.

guns_n_roses

New member
hey there everybody my names melissa. okay, im new to this and its about 2 oclock in the morning so ignore the errors.

im 16 going on 17 in september. im a tough girl, never had a fear in my life. tonight i got back from work it was about 12:30 a.m, me and my best friend that i trust with all my heart usuallly sleeps over because she works with me. We got ready for bed and all that and we laid down.

We started chatting about some guys we're tryin to set up with, and then we started cracking jokes. i cant remember what happened exactly but all of a sudden as a joke she started wiggling her toes and showing me. at first i thought it was funny but then i started getting chest pains, i started moaning, breaking downinside like my heart was tryin to escape my chest. she didnt do anything to me.

I had problems with feet before but jesus 2 weeks ago i gave her a foot rub. im not scared of feet as you can tell. atleast anymore but oh my god, it just seemed so crazy right now. im terrified to go back to bed.

This all led to me finally saying dont pull anything like that again, or ill smash your face in. she doesnt understand what i just went through, it mihgt sound crazy and i know i dont make sense but i just felt so vulnerable like there was nothing i could do to stop her.

what scared me the most is that all she did was jokingly wiggle her feet. and i started crying like a bloody wimp.
 
Sounds like you were just tired and sleepy. You shouldn't read too much into what happened. Maybe you thought she was looking for a reaction from you but being so tired, instead of humor you went the opposite direction. Just apologize to her and hopefully it will soon be forgotten.
 

guns_n_roses

New member
i finally went to the shrink. im suffering from bad panic attacks. i think my liscence will be taken away if they get worse.. he said the main caus eis my family. we have alot of problems. it had nothign to do with feet. and i relaized that its just a bad reaction i was calming down and then i got to anxious because of unbalanced chemicals... this brain i swear its the weapon of mass destruction.
 

thequietone

Well-known member
:( I feel for you guns n roses, I know how awful panic attacks can be as I too suffer from severe ones. In the car it can be scary and dangerous, I sometimes feel like I shouldn't be allowed to drive! But it's great to see that you're getting help from a psychiatrist. Medication has really helped, me regarding panic attacks.
 
Top