How do you find coping with the gym?

[Vincent]

I find it really hard, but especially the free weights room. The guys there are huge and tough looking. The women are incredible, lycra clad and limber. Last night I had the double effect of the free weights room with a confident assertive guy spotting and trying to talk to.

I was really worried about having to talk, but fortunately, he saw me taking my discman from the locker, so he took his iPod. That gave me space as he had music in one ear most of the time. Two key things he said made me sore: one, he mentioned his brother was always talking shit about things, and that he learned alot just by taking some onboard. So, automatically I thought. His brother talks alot, Im not saying shit, thats what hes thinking and thats why he mentioned it. Then, get on the ski machines and he says: I like talking on these things, makes the time fly by. How long shall we set it for? Im thinking, I have to keep talking ten to fifteen? How am I going to get through that.

Anyone go to a gym and how do you cope?



-Vin

 

[idunnoimnotcreativ]

Hey I can relate to how you feel with hitting the free weights room, but from my experience people dont look at or care what other people are doing anyways, so try to convince yourself of that fact.

But with regards to having someone to workout with and spot you, thats something to be proud of. I've been going to the gym for 2 and half months now, and I havent even become casual acquaintances with anyone there, in fact I havent ever asked anyone to spot for me because of my SA.

For making conversation, you need to stop thinking you wont have anything to say. If this guy is a talker, then you would do well by asking him open-ended questions so you can take some of the onus of the conversation off of yourself. See what topics are "hot-button topics" (ones that he enjoys talking about), and go from there. Those are a few tips but there are many other things you can do. I have trouble with keeping conversation going, but I've improved a lot by reading books about conversation (there are a lot that exist, so take comfort in the fact that a lot of people struggle with it as well).

 

[maggie]

hiya Vincent....i think you're brave to go to the gym...waiting for machines...working out in front of everyone else...and the social aspect...it's too much stress for me :roll: ...so..i work out every night...but... in my very private...basement :wink:

 

[Reholla]

Hey I too kinda struggle with this. But not any different than any other social or public situation...its just as bad going to the grocery store. But the worst part is that i go by myself a lot. Which most insecure girls have to have a work out partner, but for me I usually dont. Its not that im not insecure, but I just cant find anyone wanting to go.

So anyways its bad when i see some one I know and Im by myself. I'm usually out of breath, and its ten times as bad b/c anxiety adds to that to, so i feel like im completely not capable of being understood.

But besides that chance of running into some one I know when I myself am solo, the thing I notice most is that when i run or do any kind of cardio, my anxiety causes my heart rate to always go crazy. I guess when you work out you notice your heart rate more and my anxiety causes me to get out of breath really fast, and if that doesnt stop me from working out to my 'potential' the fact that my hearts beating so fast i feel like i may have a heart attack usually does.

This sounds really scary, but I know working outs really important. First it gives people endorphins. And people who experience more than the avg. amount of anxiety definitely should work out as much as possible because think about it...We're sitting in class with our hearts pounding and body's tense....we're sitting in the car, hearts pounding body's tense. We have no where to execute all this energy, and its forced to remain in our body. This chronic state of "excitement" is not good for any part of our bodies. Dont be scared by this, but make this be a motivator to work out and eat as healthy as possble (least amount of caffiene too).

 

[corsa]

my gym is pretty good. Everybody pretty much sticks to themselves, besides it's hard to carry on a conversation and physically exert yourself at the same time. Heres some general topics that may help keep the conversation flowing with gym strangers:
Talk about the weather
ask about the music are they listening to
talk about what gym classes they take, how often they come to the gym
What do they do for a living, do they have kids etc
talk about any local events that maybe on at the moment and whether they are planning to go or actually went to it.

all that should take about 10-20 mins to get through

 

[triceratops]

Yeah I usually find the gym hard lately I been going really early in the morning it take more effort but its usually empty and I can do whatever and dont have to wait for people to finish using stuff

 

[notyourcommodity]

when i was going to the gym at one stage, it was great because it was a 24 hour gym [crazy stuff] so i just used to go at ridiculous hours of the morning. whole place was essentially empty. although i don't live in that area anymore and want to join a new gym..but the thought of it is pretty nerve racking..