hi am new

[happywannabe]

hi every one
am 30 live in scotland and have social phobia its stop me from working going out alone ops . am single after my boyfriend left me after 12years because of my depression and anxiety he couldnt handdle me any more my moods swings my crying session when i feel very low and my self harm. just need some friendly advise thanks

 

[richkid]

I sorry to hear that your boyfriend decided to leave after so long. He obvious didn't understand and to be honest he is not right for you if he is willing to leave. Boyfriends and girlfriends are their to support each other, i hope even f you don't get back together he will remain a close friend.

Self harm you probably know in yourself is not the answer, I like to think of the film Shawshank Redemption to put it in perspective "You get busy living or you get busy diing" either way life goes on.

Why would you want to hurt yourself?
Would you hurt someone else in this way?

Everyone whats control in thier life, you have to ask yourself who is in control. If some thing is controlling you why is it controling you? Is that what you want? if no change it. Be in control of yourself.

Sometimes you have to look out for No.1 everyone else is why shouldn't you. What keeps me going is I'm tierd of this shit control me its my life and this is not how i'm going to live it. I ain't there yet but watch out because it's always the quite ones! :wink:

 

[spacecadetglowuk]

I was abused as a child and have chatted to alot of people out there who have self harmed because of it, I have never felt the urge myself and I know it is very common in abuse victims.

I think I have all my life tried not to hate or loathe myself, it hasnt been easy, tlaking to freinds has helped, I've talked to alot of SA ers who self abuse, I even helped stop an ex girlfreind from doing it when we were going out.

perhpas you should reach out and talk to others?

I know at has helped lessen it for some of my SA freinds.

 

[happywannabe]

thank for repleying

the point is i wasnt abused in any way the first time i done it iwas only 14 cos i was very shy at school and had hardly any friends but strict parents and the last time was last week.
i dont like takin about it just hoping it goes away.but i wont to share my gulit that i harmself and i want to stop
my x understood for a while and left cos he couldnt handle me any more now am all a lone but i do have a big family no children but still feel very lonely

 

[spacecadetglowuk]

I uderstand the lonliness, I've always felt alone, I have my kids with me, I have freinds and even when I had relationships I felt alone in them