getting help

[kernal]

Hi all, I'm new here and very happy to have found this - don't know too many people who understand what I'm going through. I've realized that I have a social anxiety problem/social phobia for a few years and have been avoiding/denying/hiding it for a while, all that accomplishes is bottling it up and angering myself and increasing the pain. I was convinced I could take care of it myself and I've tried (hard) to do what I can to overcome it- making myself do things that are difficult, etc. Now it built up to the point that I finally convinced myself that I need to get help. I can make small changes myself, but it's slow. This thing is holding me back from so much and I want to get rid of it. Thing is, now that I decided that, I don't know where to start. Does anyone have experience/advice to help? Therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist? What to look for? Is there any resource that lists doctors/therapists by state or something? Or does anyone know of anyone good in Baltimore? It took a lot to get to this point of acceptance, and I don't want to lose courage now - please help.

 

[jchase79]

I know what you are going though... I had roughly the same experience you are talking about. In my experience the best way to beat it is a combination of medication and therapy. If you look for mental health resources in your area you may find what you need... a mental health clinic will often be able to handle meds and therapy all in the same place. It takes a lot of courage to go get help... you'll be so much better off when you do.. and don't be discouraged if the first med you try doesn't help... I had to try 3 different ones before I found one that worked for me. something that I wish I had in my area is a group therapy type thing for social anxiety... it may help to talk to others with the same problems face to face to help overcome the anxiety of talking with people.
Hope this helps a little bit... you're on the right track. if you need anything else just ask or email me... the info is on my profile. keep in touch and let me know how you are doing
Jeremy

 

[kernal]

I'm really nervous now that it comes to actually making the appointment. Besides just being nervous to call, this actually makes it real, which is scary and sort of a stigma, even though I don't really plan on telling anyone.
I actually found a clinic that you don't even have to make the call- you can request an appointment online, which is genious when you're dealing with social phobia. I found two clinics that seem like they'd be good - if my insurance covers both and there's no major cost difference then I don't know how I'll choose. One is bigger, part of a university hospital system, the other is a smaller independent place, I think. I'm not sure which is better.
Another thing, I really really wanted to avoid medication and dealing with finding the right one and all the side effects. On the one hand it seems so easy, just take it and the anxiety is gone - I want that so badly. Or I can take the hard way and really deal with the problem. But it seems like everyone is medicated (either in addition to therapy or alone), like that's the only way to do it. Can you get off the meds eventually if therapy works, or it a long term thing?
Sorry for the long post, this is really the first time I've been able to talk about all this.

 

[jchase79]

I know how nervous you can be at first but it will be ok. Some people prefer to try and get better without medication and if that works for them-great. But for me, I don't regret starting the medication... it helped.
you would have to discuss it with a doctor when you go but yes you can eventually get off them meds as long as your anxiety is under control

In therapy you can learn ways to cope with anxiety better- the meds will not get rid of all your anxiety... it simply will bring the anxiety level down to a level you can handle comfortably.

I have a brother in law with some of the same SA and depression problems I had... he just took medication and no therapy... it took a lot longer for him to get it under control- he now wishes that he would have had some therapy too.

what part of going to the doctor are you anxious about right now? is it the idea of talking about it or just fear in general?

 

[kernal]

Just taking the first step. Also talking to people, talking about myself - not really my thing, know what I mean?
But it doesn't matter because none of the places I found are covered by my insurance. They were the ones that specialize in this kind of thing - the ones that are covered are just general counseling places. No way I'm calling to find out if they have experience treating social anxiety.

 

[kernal]

help!

I did it. I made an appointment with a therapist. I'm going to spend the next week being nervous and second guessing myself. Any advice on how to get through this and what to expect?

 

[SilentType]

You're on your way now, man. Your therapist will just want to talk about whatever is on your mind, so there's nothing to worry about. My guess is she'll try cognitive behavioral therapy, and possibly some medication.

Peace

 

[kernal]

Well I guess there's gonna be a little trial and error here. People say over and over talk to a few therapists before you choose the one thats right for you. And I said nope I'm gonna get it right the first time. Finally got the guts to make the call, even harder to get myself there, only to find out I picked the wrong guy with little experience in this area. So I'm not sticking around there to see if he can help or not. So I found myself another one, definitely more in touch with SP than most, has groups and everything. Thing is, trying this once is making it harder if thats possible. It's like now I know how nervous I got, how hard it was to talk, to say what I wanted to say...the wait for the next appointment is driving me CRAZY...I'm nervous anticipating the nervousness, if that makes any sense.
Of course as I expected, now I find myself thinking I don't really have to do this, why am i putting myself through this torture. Yea things are hard now, but maybe this is putting myself through something even harder?
Does anyone find this a kind of catch 22 - if you can't really talk and express yourself to a therapist, its hard for them to understand you to help you. And if you do talk, they dont take you as seriously because hey look you managed to get here and talk to me so you can't have that bad of a problem!
Anyone who has participated in any sp group - is it as scary as it seems? I'm particularly terrified of that...