Feeling like a weirdo!!!

[blue]

i am so sick of feeling like a weirdo, im fine a home then im out and i just adopt this weirdo persona, were i hate the way i look ,the way i talk everything i feel like such a looser

im depressed and im ranting and i dont care, im worried all the time, and i feel so trapped there is nothing i can do about it. I have 2 young children and im shit im so scared all the time.
There are things i have to do school runs in particular, i spend all day worried about the fact i will see my neighbour picking his kids up, they are in the same class and i just pannic everytime i see him

I feel so alone and scared, no one understands and the parents at the school treat me like some kind of lepper no one wants to come near me


Im not sure how much more of this i can take

 

[miss_amy]

I have similar problems on the school run. I have to check who is in the street before I open my front door to go out. If theres someone walking I usually wait until they are a safe distance gone before I go. When I arrive at school I try to stand in a place where I'm not noticable so no one speaks to me. Kids know to find me behind the post now! The walk back I have to wait for a certain person who sends my anxity sky high, has left so I'm not walking along side with her etc. I spent the entire journey in anxiety thinking 'please don't talk to me' over and over.
I just don't feel like one of them.

I feel like a total freak.

 

[blue]

yeah that sounds like my day too, all i can see is the embaressment on peoples faces like they can hardly look at me , im so miserable

how do you cope every day feels like torcher i get home after the school run and i just run to the bathroom and cry.

i carnt stand feeling like this, im such a disapointment.