Hi, I am seventeen and think I might have OCD
When I was little I used to always think that maybe everyone around me especialy my family was nice to me only to set me up. That when they asked me to run in the house to grab a juice alone, they had planned for someone to kill me. I had to count the tiles everywhere and if I got the wrong number something bad would happen...so I had to recount 4 times.
I always had this thing for the number four, it looked sad to meXD
I did'nt think much of it but when I was young I just used to doubt reality alot.
When I started 5th grade, I started more of a fear of new situations. If we had something out of the usual at school one day and I might be asked to do something I wasnt sure about...I got "sick"
I also had to have certain things even, like if I tapped my hand then I had to tap the other one.
I have a huge fear of cars, and hate driving with anyone but my mom.
I have always felt protective of my mom but recently its become sort of an obsession. I call or text her every few hours to make sure she's ok. I make her text me when she gets somewhere and when shes leaving. If she is going somewhere other than work...I have to go with her or something bad will happen. I have to wear a necklace all the time or she will get in an accident. I dont go anywhere because she might get in an accident picking me up. I always have to say love you incase those are our last words. I memorize what shes wearing. Sometimes I record her phone calls so I have the last things she said to me on tape. I do these things and then think because im thinking these things, something really IS going to happen to her.
I have to eat one bite of each food and go around to everthing, and once one thing is finished I cant eat anymore.
I have nightmares almost every night of someone being killed or trying to kill me (usually my mom dies or is trying to kill be but its not really her but it isXD)
I havent gotten my license because the mere thought of being trapped in a car with a stranger and making a mistake makes me horrified.
If I watch a whole commersial on health problems, I feel I will get them
I have vivid images of my mom or me dying that I cant stop
I always feel like people are watching me or listening to me
im obsessed with privacy
sometimes I have to run and touch something
One night, I couldnt stop thinking "I want her to die" refering to my mom and I was SOOO freaked out. I was up all night crying, checking on her, trying to think anything else but everytime I stopped thinking...it came back. And thats so not what I want!! its the exact opposite, I love her more than anyone!! and then I feel thinking these thoughts, God will have to punish me and hurt her even though I know thats not something God would do
im scared of new places and situations
sometimes I see a car and picture it in a reck
Everytime I hear a plaine outside I have to go look at it to make sure it doesnt crash into me
I sometimes feel as if the world is coming to an end and get the urge to get to confession or I will be damned to hell, and its extremely stressful because its usually in the middle of the night!
I tried to talk to my mom about it, but she just said "you need to have better faith in God"
which just made me feel worse because I always feel like I am trying to "play God" and take others and my life into my own hands, which is a sin, but I cant help it! I know what im doing helps nothing, but I have to do it...its hard to explain! and then I will have to do something to keep something bad from happening, and then I feel bad so I pray and then I feel God will punish me unless I do other things...and its really a vicious cycle!
what do you think, sound like OCD?
When I was little I used to always think that maybe everyone around me especialy my family was nice to me only to set me up. That when they asked me to run in the house to grab a juice alone, they had planned for someone to kill me. I had to count the tiles everywhere and if I got the wrong number something bad would happen...so I had to recount 4 times.
I always had this thing for the number four, it looked sad to meXD
I did'nt think much of it but when I was young I just used to doubt reality alot.
When I started 5th grade, I started more of a fear of new situations. If we had something out of the usual at school one day and I might be asked to do something I wasnt sure about...I got "sick"
I also had to have certain things even, like if I tapped my hand then I had to tap the other one.
I have a huge fear of cars, and hate driving with anyone but my mom.
I have always felt protective of my mom but recently its become sort of an obsession. I call or text her every few hours to make sure she's ok. I make her text me when she gets somewhere and when shes leaving. If she is going somewhere other than work...I have to go with her or something bad will happen. I have to wear a necklace all the time or she will get in an accident. I dont go anywhere because she might get in an accident picking me up. I always have to say love you incase those are our last words. I memorize what shes wearing. Sometimes I record her phone calls so I have the last things she said to me on tape. I do these things and then think because im thinking these things, something really IS going to happen to her.
I have to eat one bite of each food and go around to everthing, and once one thing is finished I cant eat anymore.
I have nightmares almost every night of someone being killed or trying to kill me (usually my mom dies or is trying to kill be but its not really her but it isXD)
I havent gotten my license because the mere thought of being trapped in a car with a stranger and making a mistake makes me horrified.
If I watch a whole commersial on health problems, I feel I will get them
I have vivid images of my mom or me dying that I cant stop
I always feel like people are watching me or listening to me
im obsessed with privacy
sometimes I have to run and touch something
One night, I couldnt stop thinking "I want her to die" refering to my mom and I was SOOO freaked out. I was up all night crying, checking on her, trying to think anything else but everytime I stopped thinking...it came back. And thats so not what I want!! its the exact opposite, I love her more than anyone!! and then I feel thinking these thoughts, God will have to punish me and hurt her even though I know thats not something God would do
im scared of new places and situations
sometimes I see a car and picture it in a reck
Everytime I hear a plaine outside I have to go look at it to make sure it doesnt crash into me
I sometimes feel as if the world is coming to an end and get the urge to get to confession or I will be damned to hell, and its extremely stressful because its usually in the middle of the night!
I tried to talk to my mom about it, but she just said "you need to have better faith in God"
which just made me feel worse because I always feel like I am trying to "play God" and take others and my life into my own hands, which is a sin, but I cant help it! I know what im doing helps nothing, but I have to do it...its hard to explain! and then I will have to do something to keep something bad from happening, and then I feel bad so I pray and then I feel God will punish me unless I do other things...and its really a vicious cycle!
what do you think, sound like OCD?
