peacegrrl
Active member
I've been having thoughts about self-harm — which is why, before anyone starts worrying, I want to confide in some friends who know about my anxiety.
One of them in particular I'm not so sure how to approach. For the sake of privacy, her name is Tanya. Tanya is a good and trustworthy person. We've had many deep conversations. But she doesn't know how to handle sadness. What I mean is, I believe she hasn't dealt with many sad people to know it's more than a matter of trying to "keep your chin up". I feel better telling the others about my woes because often they come back with a practical solution. One even went to the trouble of hooking me up with a psychologist via email. Their advice I can actually use and I feel better for actively doing something for my health.
I know Tanya means well, but if managing anxiety was simply matter of "thinking positive" then I and many people on this forum would likely not be members. It is secretly frustrating to know she can't really help me in the way I need to be helped. Worse is the guilt of having dumped my problem on her in the first place. I feel that she is such a decent happy and not to mention busy person and along I come, dragging her into my dark world.
But my other guilt is that I can't not tell her because she is my friend. She'd be hurt if she thought I couldn't trust her with the heavy stuff. And frankly, I don't like keeping things from her even if it results in me feeling worse off for speaking up.
So... Should I save her the pain of being dragged into my brand new dilemma, and keep quiet? Should I tell her anyway since she is, after all, a friend who'll listen? Or should I get my head checked because there is such an obvious answer to this question that it might even be a subconscious attempt to procrastinate from saying anything to anyone at all?
One of them in particular I'm not so sure how to approach. For the sake of privacy, her name is Tanya. Tanya is a good and trustworthy person. We've had many deep conversations. But she doesn't know how to handle sadness. What I mean is, I believe she hasn't dealt with many sad people to know it's more than a matter of trying to "keep your chin up". I feel better telling the others about my woes because often they come back with a practical solution. One even went to the trouble of hooking me up with a psychologist via email. Their advice I can actually use and I feel better for actively doing something for my health.
I know Tanya means well, but if managing anxiety was simply matter of "thinking positive" then I and many people on this forum would likely not be members. It is secretly frustrating to know she can't really help me in the way I need to be helped. Worse is the guilt of having dumped my problem on her in the first place. I feel that she is such a decent happy and not to mention busy person and along I come, dragging her into my dark world.
But my other guilt is that I can't not tell her because she is my friend. She'd be hurt if she thought I couldn't trust her with the heavy stuff. And frankly, I don't like keeping things from her even if it results in me feeling worse off for speaking up.
So... Should I save her the pain of being dragged into my brand new dilemma, and keep quiet? Should I tell her anyway since she is, after all, a friend who'll listen? Or should I get my head checked because there is such an obvious answer to this question that it might even be a subconscious attempt to procrastinate from saying anything to anyone at all?
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