Attitudes towards 'unsocial' people

[cutekoala]

One thing that really bothers me is the way that people treat people with evident problems with socialising. In my classes or in general conversation sometimes, I'll hear others talking about people who from what they say I gather find social situations uncomfortable, and they'll make comments like, 'That person just isn't social' or like in class today, my tecaher referred to someone (outside of the school) as 'socially dysfuntional'. Comments like that even when not directed at me make me really angry- I almost feel like going up and saying, 'well actually, maybe that person isn't rude or dysfunctional, maybe they actually have a real problem that they're desperately trying to hide? :roll: '

Do any of you guys ever feel like that?

 

[DancingDann]

I know what you mean. When people who don't know you think that you are rude or ignorant just because you are too shy or embarrassed to say hello to them.

 

[coriander1992]

I know what you mean. When people who don't know you think that you are rude or ignorant just because you are too shy or embarrassed to say hello to them.

Tell me about it . Everybody at school seems to think i'm a snob just because I won't talk to anybody but my close friends. It annoys me that people make such assumptions :evil:

 

[ash_2001]

Yes, labels are quite annoying to deal with, but in most situations I still wouldn't deny the fact that I am anti-social. So in a sense, these people are simply stating the truth. And in a perfect world that's where the line would be drawn.

What I do find hard to deal with is the people who like to discuss such endeavours. So I don't say much, does it infringe on your rights as a human being somehow? No, so talk about something that actually matters. How much can you possibly think of something to say about a topic like that anyway - that is usually when gossip begins and truth turns to bullshit.

Buuut you know the saying: "Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and small minds discuss people."

Btw, coriander1992 love your signature. Great song, huh? I take it you must've seen Donnie Darko?

 

[coriander1992]

Yes, labels are quite annoying to deal with, but in most situations I still wouldn't deny the fact that I am anti-social. So in a sense, these people are simply stating the truth. And in a perfect world that's where the line would be drawn.

What I do find hard to deal with is the people who like to discuss such endeavours. So I don't say much, does it infringe on your rights as a human being somehow? No, so talk about something that actually matters. How much can you possibly think of something to say about a topic like that anyway - that is usually when gossip begins and truth turns to bullshit.

Buuut you know the saying: "Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and small minds discuss people."

Btw, coriander1992 love your signature. Great song, huh? I take it you must've seen Donnie Darko?

he he, thanks, yeah I have seen that film, but I don't really get it at all lol just really like that song

 

[ash_2001]

Yes, labels are quite annoying to deal with, but in most situations I still wouldn't deny the fact that I am anti-social. So in a sense, these people are simply stating the truth. And in a perfect world that's where the line would be drawn.

What I do find hard to deal with is the people who like to discuss such endeavours. So I don't say much, does it infringe on your rights as a human being somehow? No, so talk about something that actually matters. How much can you possibly think of something to say about a topic like that anyway - that is usually when gossip begins and truth turns to bullshit.

Buuut you know the saying: "Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and small minds discuss people."

Btw, coriander1992 love your signature. Great song, huh? I take it you must've seen Donnie Darko?

he he, thanks, yeah I have seen that film, but I don't really get it at all lol just really like that song

I just found out that apparently there's a book out called The Donnie Darko Book (who would've thought, heh) explaining some of the ways you can interpret the movie. I'm kind of tempted to get it now. Grr. Evil marketing and the thurst for knowledge combined with my resourcefulness/nerdiness. :twisted: :lol:

 

[coriander1992]

Yes, labels are quite annoying to deal with, but in most situations I still wouldn't deny the fact that I am anti-social. So in a sense, these people are simply stating the truth. And in a perfect world that's where the line would be drawn.

What I do find hard to deal with is the people who like to discuss such endeavours. So I don't say much, does it infringe on your rights as a human being somehow? No, so talk about something that actually matters. How much can you possibly think of something to say about a topic like that anyway - that is usually when gossip begins and truth turns to bullshit.

Buuut you know the saying: "Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and small minds discuss people."

Btw, coriander1992 love your signature. Great song, huh? I take it you must've seen Donnie Darko?

he he, thanks, yeah I have seen that film, but I don't really get it at all lol just really like that song

I just found out that apparently there's a book out called The Donnie Darko Book (who would've thought, heh) explaining some of the ways you can interpret the movie. I'm kind of tempted to get it now. Grr. Evil marketing and the thurst for knowledge combined with my resourcefulness/nerdiness. :twisted: :lol:

:lol: , you should get it :wink:

 

[Spearmint]

..

 

[random]

For many years I had only heard the term 'introverted' used in a manner that suggests inferiority and social dysfunction. Then I found the Briggs- Meyers theory of personality that identifies people as normal along sliding scale between introverted (person who gets energy or charges up during their time alone and is spending energy when among people) and extroverted (person who gets charged up when spending time with people and is draining energy when they are alone). Thus far research seems to indicate that 25% of the population is thought to be Introverted and so there's the 75% of people who are extroverted.
One article I read indicated that a particular study was designed by a group of researches who were all extroverts so they defined - in their experiment - traits of introversion as unhealthy and extroveresion as healthy. I think this is yet another reason why attitudes toward social iteraction are slanted against intoverts)
But if I accept that 25% of the population is normally introvert - the world does make some sense. There are many jobs that require an introvert (for example - computer programmer) who can work in isolation and there are many jobs that require extroversion (sales).
On top of being introverted - I have SA. I don't know which one triggers the co-dependent response in people but I have learned not to say I have SA because nice people who mean well believe they can 'fix' me by teaching me how to make small talk or telling them not to be nervous. There is that nagging belief in the socially fearless that those who are not fearless just aren't 'nice', are not willing to 'try' etc. Nothing like being socially judged to further isolate an SAer.....