From my experience, it is best to start with self-knowledge. Be honest with yourself without any reservations. Who are you, really? What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses? Include everything in the picture. But be objective. Don't do self-pity along the way. What are your talents, hobbies, dreams, goals? What is your definition of success? Take no thought about other people, even your family. Do not consider what they want in answering the questions. The answers have to be yours, from deep inside you. Know yourself more each day.
Once you've built a strong sense of self-identity, you can be more assertive. Less and less people can intimidate you for you know what you want. You don't need to depend on other people's standards because you have your own. Know your ground and stand there. That is the most stable place you can find. Cultivate a healthy feeling of self-respect. Acknowledge your choices, your preferences, your personality, your decisions, everything about yourself. Be comfortable with the way you walk, the way you talk, the way you laugh, etc. Know that there is nothing wrong about them.
If you have the resources, ask for professional help. They always know what to do. If not, improvise. You know yourself. You know what you need. In my case, hypnosis tapes and positive affirmations help a lot.
Welcome to the forum btw...
