I am not even all that passive. I just don't agree with the simply "sexually motivated intent" to interact with a woman simply because you think she looks hot, etc.
But then again I'm not even that spontaneous. But then again.. if one has been alone all his life, how can you be? if all your life all you've had is loneliness, and you've never had decent social status,have no clue of society, or social skills, etc. and there are hardly any places to learn these things because "you were supposed to learn them NATURALLY, otherwise you are a mentally disabled person, or amoral freak/demon/stupid etc." At least in my area. My history just sucks. Usually people are more comfortable being spontaneous because, they've had social status, they have some friends around, here and there. They know what works and what doesn't. They know shit. It's common sense to them. Still though, that doesn't make an excuse for predatory behavior. Or at least, the way I see it, looks predatory, because it simply isn't "natural" for me. It's not "right" for me. When I would do it, it's predatory.
How can any man, in their right mind, feel comfortable hitting on a girl and interacting with one, solely because he thinks she 'looks hot' and "SEXY?" Don't you think others would pick up on this too? Would you do that in front of your grandmother, or around kids? Around a bunch of lonely women who are obviously "not as hot/sexy" as this one? Wouldn't you feel like you are being somewhat perverted? Wouldn't you prefer more normal interaction, and then wait a little to make your move instead of just bardging in there with an implied proposition, in a place/situation that is NOT appropriate (ie away from the bar/club scene, or "meat market" scene)?
Ever since the beginning of the bar/club scene, the way of meeting the opposite sex I think, has changed for a vast majority of people. It first of all has to do with treating a bar/club as solely a place to "pick up women" or "find a potential mate or sex partner". To carry that same style off into the public arena is absurd because that only works in clubs (unless the woman is really that dense and doesn't see througfh it either), and even then if it works in clubs, it's because people ARE that dense, and think that it's a place where anything flies, you can be vile etc, and became a place you wouldn't take your son or daughter to, or your grandmother, or anyone else who wouldn't be appropriate because it's "too wild".
How can any man, in their right mind, feel comfortable hitting on a girl and interacting with one, solely because he thinks she 'looks hot' and "SEXY?"
It's simple. As you don't know her, her looks are what have caught your attention in the first place. Would you not want to know whether she is as interesting on the inside as she is on the outside? I certainly would.
Would you do that in front of your grandmother, or around kids?
Yes, I would.
Around a bunch of lonely women who are obviously "not as hot/sexy" as this one?
Yes, because that's life. I could never be romantically interested in someone who I don't find sexually attractive, and there's no sense in giving "less hot" women "a chance", if you just don't like their looks. It's never going to change, and if you start a relationship hoping that the person will alter his/her looks somehow, it's a lost battle from the get-go. (And questionable, as there is no sense in wanting to be with someone you want to change right from the start. Such imperfections and expectations cannot lead to stable relationships.)
Wouldn't you feel like you are being somewhat perverted?
No, I feel perfectly fine, thanks. How would it be perverted to find subjectively good-looking people 'sexy'?
Wouldn't you prefer more normal interaction, and then wait a little to make your move instead of just bardging in there with an implied proposition, in a place/situation that is NOT appropriate
Who does that anyway? And, yes, what people do is usually 'normal', and no, I would not want to wait. If you wait, there's no rational reason to stop waiting after a certain time. I, personally, would prefer to meet someone at a library and go to a café together, where we discuss and study Bionanotechnology and Mathematical Physics together. You can't always get what you want, though. That's why I prefer solitude.
you make me want to kill myself. you give everyone an overly-materialistic and savage viewpoint of society. why? well I bet most people would actually believe you, and most especially the women.
Just explain in clear arguments why you think that I am overly materialistic, superficial, and propagate a 'savage viewpoint' of society.
If you don't do that, you nullify every single statement of yours, as it would prove that you either did not read a single word of what someone had to say, or did not take the time to think about it, for the sole purpose of protecting your delusional belief of what society is like.
Everything you have said describes a very harsh view of reality. And you support your "harsh reality."
I said 'clear arguments'. It obviously isn't self-explanatory. What's so hard about defending your personal attacks? Are there perhaps no clear reasons you could come up with? Anyway - that response of yours is sufficient for me to stop the discussion.
You have made a personal religion out of your delusional picture of society. I don't discuss religions.
hmmm...I like assertive guys but I doesn't mean you can be an asshole to me. You can be a little assertive and still be a gentlemen. I am usually the aggressive one in the relationship. Men/women have told me that I am very intimidating. I personally do not see why...Im only 5'0 100lbs. lol
why? because you expect men to be so open with sexuality to the point of being vulgar and not caring about whether it is vulgar or not. I consider it harsh, and overly aggressive. I'm not the type nor do I think it is right to be such a way. Especially because I'm not the type of person to be that way. Sexuality is an intimate thing, not something you just push onto someone especially a woman who might take offense to that and think you are being too harsh or you just don't know what you're doing.
I just couldn't do it. It wouldn't come out right, and like I said I'm not that type of person. Maybe I just haven't been with a woman who I can be open like that with, but as I said right now it doesn't sit well with me to be so forceful about sexuality to the point of almost sounding like a jerk, or too aggressive.
And if a woman does not like this from me, because I want to be careful, and because I CARE, then she is full of it. She is simply attracted to the "aggression", the overly macho appeal, etc.
not that I can't be "macho" when I need to be. but like I said.. it's not something I feel comfortable just throwing out there onto people especially if it's not welcome. I didn't grow up that way.
a woman who doesn't jump reflexively after a shiny thing like a trained animal would, and instead takes a moment of pause, makes a contemplated decision.
ie, just because she sees what she views as 'assertiveness' (although I call it aggression because people don't really know how to be assertive without being harsh and it's really just an excuse to lack control over oneself) she can step back and do the above I just said, because what she really might be attracted to is a false autonomic subconscious belief built into her from society that "women are attracted to pure raw violent aggression and brutality".
I find it especially wrong when the guy doesn't really care whether that violent aggression and brutality and lack of self control is direct towards HER especially when it isn't welcome, and if they don't even know what the hell's really going on.
Just because someone DISPLAYS authority doesn't mean he/she is really being authoritative.
But it appears to be guaranteed that I am an aggressive asshole, superficial, and overly materialistic, who opportunistically supports a harsh reality. And I can't even defend myself against this categorization. Nor can the women who no1 condemns. They don't even have the privilege to behold his posts.
hmmm...I like assertive guys but I doesn't mean you can be an asshole to me. You can be a little assertive and still be a gentlemen. I am usually the aggressive one in the relationship. Men/women have told me that I am very intimidating. I personally do not see why...Im only 5'0 100lbs. lol
Ha, don't sell yourself so short, you'd be surprised how many smaller people have such agression sometimes.
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