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Just as i thought my depression couldnt get worse i entered a new stage. Now i think like over 100 times a day: i want to die :cry: . But i dont want to die because i see happy people around me and i want to be like them. That's the dilemma of depression i guess. You want to live like others...

Man, my life really is at the worst at the moment. It's a miracle im still living. I get up late in the morning eat a sandwich make myself a cup of coffee read the newspaper. Then i watch some television surf the net a bit. Then i read a book and even when im bored im not going out of my house...