is there such things as friends?

i became really low about a year ago due to my S.A (probably close to a breakdown) and talked to what i thought were friends about my illness they were all people ive known for 15 years+ and seemed genuinely concerned but as time has passed they have slowly dwindled away maybe they have there own problems to deal with but i thought friends were there to help each other out.......just wondered if you people have come across the same thing?

Depends on what do you classify as friends. Noone is perfect. (Are YOU always there for your people? Do YOU know what's bugging THEM, what is it that THEY are fighting? Right, the answer would be probably "no" for many people (including, I admit, me).) Noone is perfect and noone makes a perfect friend. And after all the truth is that "we are alone all the way through and then we die". That's the way it is. So lets go and try and make it easier for someone. The only thing you can do is give as much as you can and hope that you will receive at least something.

I agree with Tryin. If you want help through the difficulties of SA, go to some of your friends and show them that you're there for them. I don't exactly know how you're going to do this, but if you have the courage to pour your heart out about your anxiety then I'm sure you can come up with something. If they know you're there for them, they will undoubtedly return the favor.

Peace

To put it nicely, friends are there to help each other, but to put it bluntly, friends are just people who make use of each other. Of course not everyone is like that, but I think it is quite often the case that friends disappear when either you are in trouble and friends drift away slowly(because they have too much problems to cope with even on their own that they don't have much energy left to help you), or vice versa (when your friend is in trouble and you drift away slowly). Its not always intentional, but it happens without us realizing it sometimes.



In the other cases of 'friends', they aren't true friends, they are just people who stick together because they want someone to have lunch with, someone to go to the shops with, someone to go clubbing with. In other words, some friends are people who make use of each other for company. When I was in school, there was a group of friends that I had that were like that. I didn't feel we were true friends, but rather, I felt we sticked together because we needed each other. I didn't want to be seen sitting in lectures or the canteen alone, neither did they, so we sticked together and became 'friends'.

For me its a matter of relating. Because of my SA i never had experience with being around people my age so therefore i dont know what to talk about. So they find me boring and I seem to always be the one initiating. So when i give up the relationship dies.

For me its a matter of relating. Because of my SA i never had experience with being around people my age so therefore i dont know what to talk about. So they find me boring and I seem to always be the one initiating. So when i give up the relationship dies.