Do you judge others the way you fear they judge you?

A thought that's been haunting me for awhile... My family was very judgemental, and i'm sure a lot of you had/have judgemental parents or peers. Now... i'm wondering whether I picked up this judgemental mentality from my parents and sisters, and assume negative judgement will seep from every corner of every mouth because perhaps I inflict it on others as well. But then this doesn't make sense... everybody I 'judge' I do so positively, they are all so much better than me in so many ways. Am I trying to fight the overseen instinct to judge negatively and resort to my misanthropic self, and so I jump to the opposite, being praise?

It still doesn't seem quite right, because everybody I come across I really AM full of pure burning jealousy and lust. But that damn question still haunts me and causes me to put myself down, what else could my learned-nature be if not this?? What do you think?

I judge people and I have often had to eat humble pie because I have got it so wrong !


However .....I think we all do it ! Even if its something as simple as presuming a person is very poor because of the way they dress ..no harm is meant and we are allowed our private thoughts. The danger is when you judge wrongly and spread ill word of that person , you taint them with something they maybe innocent of.

... everybody I 'judge' I do so positively

Click to expand...

maybe you put too much pressure on yourself to find something positive about everybody , it sounds like a perfect world to be in , but the reality is we will not like some people and then its very hard not to judge.

So maybe you feel like this .....

It still doesn't seem quite right, because everybody I come across I really AM full of pure burning jealousy and lust.

Click to expand...

because your trying to hard not to have judgmental thoughts.

No I'm pretty much like you EA. I judge people very well. I tend to look away from most peoples faults and I try not to make people feel uneasy because of any flaws they might have. I think I am this way to others because I want them to be this way to me. I feel really insecure most of the time. So I feel it is wrong for me to belittle someone for any reason (even if it be true), because I know I would not be able to handle that type of ridicule myself. Even though I usually show this type of behaviour to others I rarely, if ever, receive it back.

I usually empathise with people who seem similar to me. Whereas I think others find people like me to be weak, and it gives them more of an incentive to prey on that "weakness". One thing I know is that I rather be "weak", then prey on the "weak".

I think this has more to do with you judging yourself, then it has to do with you judging others. :3

Everybody has apparent good, and bad qualities. The personal bad qualities tend to stand out more then your good ones. As opposed to the good qualities of stranger, which usually stand out more. Especially when you're insecure about yourself.

Like Serafina said, judging is only normal to a certain extent. How we judge usually starts with how we feel about ourselves. If you're arrogant, you'll look down onto people. If you're insecure, you'll look up to people. Finding a middle ground is usually pretty difficult.

I don't judge people because I don't think I have a right to judge anyone I am probably the least perfect person around.

we all do that - judging actions is ok. in fact, we have to judge others actions, or we could not form any opinions about right and wrong. it's when we start judging others on their faith that we get in trouble.