Cure for blushing that worked for me!.....

cadaver_

Well-known member
I've become an almost chronic blusher until my therapist sent me the following information to look over. Nothing earth shattering, just a different way of thinking.

"What happens to you does not, by itself, cause how you feel or what you do. People do not make you angry. You make yourself angry about what people do. Bad things do not make you feel sad or depressed. You make yourself feel sad or depressed. Dangerous situations do not make you scared. You make yourself scared. People or things do not make you happy. You do. It is what happens to you AND what you believe it means to you or about you that results in how you feel and what you do. This is pretty good news because it gives you a lot of freedom."

That's it. I had to read this over and over to let it sink in and realize that I had a lot of control that I was simply giving away to others. I'm about 95% blush-free now, which is fine with me because EVERYONE blushes at some point in their lives. Don't know if it will help everyone but I thought I'd post it.

Good luck with this.
 

sidney

Well-known member
im sorry but i need more explaination of this, so what exactly did u do, just recite that or something and somehow that made your blushing stop??
 

cadaver_

Well-known member
sidney said:
im sorry but i need more explaination of this, so what exactly did u do, just recite that or something and somehow that made your blushing stop??

Well, sort of. I had a way of thinking where I just internalized every situation. I'd face each day with the knowledge that I would blush. But now I feel I'm more in control of what situations I let bother me. Think of it this way: "People/situations don't make me blush...I do". And if you think about it, it's absolutely true. It's what you BELIEVE the situation personally means to you that causes your reaction. It's just that we've become so automatic in our thinking that we never allow another reaction other than blushing.

Just recently I spilled something at work in front of a lot of watching co-workers and I didn't even blush. Just picked it all up and walked on. But you have to face the day realizing that you're in control of every reaction you have to EVERY situation you will encounter.
 

krs2snow

Well-known member
Cadaver, I really like what you're saying and your post but I don't know how to internalize this. In most situations where I blush, I consciously know there is no reason for it and my logical mind is saying "You have no reason to feel stupid/embarrassed/whatever. But, there I go and blush again! And then I'm mad at myself for letting it happen! How did you wrap you mind around this idea so that it really took hold?
 

cadaver_

Well-known member
krs2snow said:
Cadaver, I really like what you're saying and your post but I don't know how to internalize this. In most situations where I blush, I consciously know there is no reason for it and my logical mind is saying "You have no reason to feel stupid/embarrassed/whatever. But, there I go and blush again! And then I'm mad at myself for letting it happen! How did you wrap you mind around this idea so that it really took hold?

I know what you're saying. I was the type that tried everything I read but nothing seemed to work for me. All I know was that this clicked for me for whatever reason. It definately won't happen overnight. Just read it every day before you do something or go somewhere that you're prone to blushing. Don't just read the words but really think about what you're reading. Don't know if it will work for you as it did for me but it's worth the effort. Hope this helped.
 

sidney

Well-known member
thanks for that, i really will try it but since its gotten so embedded into my head it'll be hard to ignore the thoughts and sort of re-programme them but hopefully it has some effect
 

TAMPA-BAY

Well-known member
Well dont CADAVER. I dont blush ever cause its physicaly impossiable for me to ever blush but your underlying concept is what I am using to deal with my Anxiety.

I am constantly practicing the concept that my shynes/anxiety are internal which means its cause by internal factors. The biggest factor is my thinking. I believe in the concept that our thoughts and thinking determin our moods.

So i can see how people can blush just by whats on their mind.
 
thats a bit like the blushpage program. do you use any of the mental games and strategies when you are talking to people. you can trick your mind not to blush
 
Top