ForeverBlue
Active member
Hi everyone
Just thought I would put some thoughts down instead of obsessing over them in my head! :lol:
Of course having SP makes most times crap times but I guess I am going thru a really bad time. I have my ups and downs. In my up times I just go along on my not so merry way and kind of forget that I have SP, or perhaps just accept it and not stress over it.
But at the moment it seems exaggerated. I have been having some restless nights, crying, frustrated like I just want to scream all the time, and everything seems to be annoying me.
I am having a bad time at work. I am kind of at a supervisor level and most of the staff around me are lazy and are too busy conducting their social lives. I feel like a lot of pressure is on me and I am sick of being the only one who worries about the job being done properly. Certain staff always seem to be off (sickies) and don't care how their absence affects other staff. People can be so selfish sometimes.
It has gradually being getting worse at work and I have decided that I have had enough. I am selling my house (l live in a city area) and I am moving to a country town. My mum lives with me so I won't have to do it on my own. Once I sell my house I will be able to quit work asap until I actually move which is a blessing. The thought of staying there any longer than I have to makes me feel ill. I have been there for several years and it has just worn me down.
On top of that, I feel like I have been stagnating for the last 7 years. I don't have a boyfriend, social life or close friends that I see on a regular basis. The one person I got along with at work stabbed me in the back unjustly so I am not as close or trusting. And a guy at work who I have had feelings for on and off for years just makes me feel frustrated whenever i see him and I hate the make he makes me feel. So I need to get away from him so I can lose what feelings I do have for him. We have a history and several false starts and in the end nothing eventuated. I have wasted too much time on having feelings for him.
I need a fresh start. But then I worry that I will have the same life that I have now, only in a different place. :? Has anyone left the place they are familiar with and moved to a completely different area? How did it work out? Did you improve and feel somehow liberated?
oh so much to contemplate. 8O
I even considered that since I am moving to a country town, I might get my drivers licence so I have more options in terms of work and recreational activities (lol, if I can manage to face ppl). but the more I think about having to drive a car, oooohhhh the other cars, road rules, accidents...scary :lol:
Oh I am so tired thinking about it.....I know I have to get out of comfort zone for my life to change but as we all know it's damn hard!!!!
Anyway, that's my ramble for now. Over and out!
Just thought I would put some thoughts down instead of obsessing over them in my head! :lol:
Of course having SP makes most times crap times but I guess I am going thru a really bad time. I have my ups and downs. In my up times I just go along on my not so merry way and kind of forget that I have SP, or perhaps just accept it and not stress over it.
But at the moment it seems exaggerated. I have been having some restless nights, crying, frustrated like I just want to scream all the time, and everything seems to be annoying me.
I am having a bad time at work. I am kind of at a supervisor level and most of the staff around me are lazy and are too busy conducting their social lives. I feel like a lot of pressure is on me and I am sick of being the only one who worries about the job being done properly. Certain staff always seem to be off (sickies) and don't care how their absence affects other staff. People can be so selfish sometimes.
It has gradually being getting worse at work and I have decided that I have had enough. I am selling my house (l live in a city area) and I am moving to a country town. My mum lives with me so I won't have to do it on my own. Once I sell my house I will be able to quit work asap until I actually move which is a blessing. The thought of staying there any longer than I have to makes me feel ill. I have been there for several years and it has just worn me down.
On top of that, I feel like I have been stagnating for the last 7 years. I don't have a boyfriend, social life or close friends that I see on a regular basis. The one person I got along with at work stabbed me in the back unjustly so I am not as close or trusting. And a guy at work who I have had feelings for on and off for years just makes me feel frustrated whenever i see him and I hate the make he makes me feel. So I need to get away from him so I can lose what feelings I do have for him. We have a history and several false starts and in the end nothing eventuated. I have wasted too much time on having feelings for him.
I need a fresh start. But then I worry that I will have the same life that I have now, only in a different place. :? Has anyone left the place they are familiar with and moved to a completely different area? How did it work out? Did you improve and feel somehow liberated?
oh so much to contemplate. 8O
I even considered that since I am moving to a country town, I might get my drivers licence so I have more options in terms of work and recreational activities (lol, if I can manage to face ppl). but the more I think about having to drive a car, oooohhhh the other cars, road rules, accidents...scary :lol:
Oh I am so tired thinking about it.....I know I have to get out of comfort zone for my life to change but as we all know it's damn hard!!!!
Anyway, that's my ramble for now. Over and out!