Earthbound_Misfit
Well-known member
My anxiety levels are extremely high right now. They are so high that it is pulling me into a very dark and hostile place. It's somewhere I don't like being but at this point... I see no other choice. It has been a truly horrible day and I'm finding it EXTREMELY difficult to keep the rage under control but so far... I have done it. Instead of breaking the person in half.... I beat the hell out of a punching bag.. and when that wasn't enough... i took an axe to the holly bush that my mom wanted removed. (I now have blisters, scrapes and bruises all over my hands.. go me!) I am doing all that i can to keep from being totally submerged in it... I have come too far in my healthy life to lose that now.. but it's SO hard to take the high road and be the better person even though i know if i do that next right thing.. no matter how much better i think i would feel if i just beat the unholy **** out of this person... I'll be ok. I know that doing hard physical work like swinging an axe at a branch is better than breaking somone's neck. *sigh*