of_darkness
Well-known member
It's a funny thing. I'm definately not normal as I"m sure you're all taking for granted.
But sometimes I just lose it , like when I walked to school yesterday. I actually walked there feeling like it was time for improvement (And I had changed the direction of my hair.......hah. Never done that before and not it's staying that way. I feel amazing), and I was walking with the rising sun in my eyes and just felt really really cool. never done that in the morning.
So I got to school and just did loads of weird stuff, and acted really differently! Instead of entering my classroom for registration and sitting at the back quietly, I sat on a desk right in the middle where everyone else was and had no idea what I was doing. I didn't really care about anything then, so I took what happened as it happened. Nothing happened!!! But still, it felt cool! I walked properly, looked everyone in the eye and didn't look at the floor. At least not right at my feet.
It's almost like being drunk....when I'm drunk I'm not 'normal' but just really odd. I do random stuff and get much closer to people than I would normaly.
What is there to lose?! Turns out more people looked at me strangely which made me start to think twice, but I really need to realize how much I look at other people!!! I'm always catching people's eyes and they must feel as bad as I do! That's a pleasant way of thinking of it. There's a girl on her gap year working at the music school who I regularly happen to accidentally meet gazes with (not much older than me at all which is terrifying!) , so I'm glad she didn't appear on that day!! I must appear like some kind of psycho to everyone else......
Anyway that was my monthly random contribution. I must be absolutely no hep whatsoever to you guys but face it, if there was a miracle cure we'd know about it. I hate life, it's also lovely. That sums it all up for me.
But sometimes I just lose it , like when I walked to school yesterday. I actually walked there feeling like it was time for improvement (And I had changed the direction of my hair.......hah. Never done that before and not it's staying that way. I feel amazing), and I was walking with the rising sun in my eyes and just felt really really cool. never done that in the morning.
So I got to school and just did loads of weird stuff, and acted really differently! Instead of entering my classroom for registration and sitting at the back quietly, I sat on a desk right in the middle where everyone else was and had no idea what I was doing. I didn't really care about anything then, so I took what happened as it happened. Nothing happened!!! But still, it felt cool! I walked properly, looked everyone in the eye and didn't look at the floor. At least not right at my feet.
It's almost like being drunk....when I'm drunk I'm not 'normal' but just really odd. I do random stuff and get much closer to people than I would normaly.
What is there to lose?! Turns out more people looked at me strangely which made me start to think twice, but I really need to realize how much I look at other people!!! I'm always catching people's eyes and they must feel as bad as I do! That's a pleasant way of thinking of it. There's a girl on her gap year working at the music school who I regularly happen to accidentally meet gazes with (not much older than me at all which is terrifying!) , so I'm glad she didn't appear on that day!! I must appear like some kind of psycho to everyone else......
Anyway that was my monthly random contribution. I must be absolutely no hep whatsoever to you guys but face it, if there was a miracle cure we'd know about it. I hate life, it's also lovely. That sums it all up for me.