Poem I wrote, when remembering my last school.

[W1CKEDJO]

.........................

 

[HexNoir]

Ever write positive material? I like your style, but the negativity is overbearing!

 

[Sacrament]

Terrible.

 

[Sacrament]

Oh, so this is why you sent me a private message.

Well, I never said I wasn't sorry that you had to go through such rough times. I only said the poem was terrible. Would you prefer if I had lied?

Also, don't make it sound as if I have or haven't been through this and that. I've had my fair share of bullying as well, ever since I was in Primary School.

 

[Sacrament]

I'm not. I didn't say anything about you or who you are because I don't know you. As far as I know, you are a kind, loving person who I am sure puppies and kittens would love. I was talking about your poem in specific as for what it is: a poem.

As a poem, it is a terrible amalgam of clichés, verse after verse.

 

[dottie]

Terrible.

Terrible comment.

 

[Sacrament]

I am not jealous, trust me.

And yes, I do write poetry, but there is no purpose whatsoever in showing it to you.

I'm not even comparing.

 

[HexNoir]

Quit your bitching. Both of you.

 

[alter_ego]

All those years of hurt and blame
And tears that fell like pouring rain.
Words that cut like razor-blades.
Soul, black as the ace of spades.

You think that after all these years
I might forget and dry those tears.
Those memories, I can't forget.
So many things that I regret.

Perhaps I should have been a bi*ch
Like all the rest that liked to snitch.
But instead, I was too nice.
And for that, I payed a price.

People sneered and picked on me.
I put it down to jealousy.
I was smart, but they were sly.
Those bullies made me want to die.

And when I told my "friends", they said,
That it was all inside my head.
They wondered why I was depressed,
And moaned at me for being stressed.

Perhaps next time, you'll understand
That victims need a helping hand.
And if you all refuse to see,
Then don't expect f*ck-all from me!

Actually, WickedJo, I just read your poem and I thought it was excellent. It spoke so much from the heart. I could well imagine it being used in an anti-bullying campaign.

I wouldn't take negative criticism too seriously. Poetry is very much a matter of personal taste (eg I like Robert Frost and John Masefield but I never particularly liked Wordsworth or Philip Larkin). I really liked your poem.

 

[alter_ego]

Thank you very much alter_ego. Your comment made me smile. =]

Glad to hear it. I meant every word, I loved your poem.

 

[shon]

Holy crap!!!

8O This site should be a safe place to express yourself without having to worry about criticism. I honestly thought the poem was really good. Wish I could express myself like that!

 

[apple85]

well its not a good idea to post a poem about ur personal trials and then ask others to evaluate it. Its like an invitation to ridicule. You dont need their approval for ur poem becuase its personal and you wrote it. It will probably mostly have more meaning for you than others - unless it is very good and you have spent a lot of time on it. But dont stress, art is about expressing who you are and ur experiences, not creating masterpieces that others will love but that say nothing meaningful.

Oh and by the way sacrament sounds bitter and self righteous.....it was insensitive and idiotic of him/her to criticize your personal experience and even more childish to try and defend it-they messed up and now they wont admit it.....

 

[shon]

well its not a good idea to post a poem about ur personal trials and then ask others to evaluate it. Its like an invitation to ridicule. You dont need their approval for ur poem becuase its personal and you wrote it. It will probably mostly have more meaning for you than others - unless it is very good and you have spent a lot of time on it. But dont stress, art is about expressing who you are and ur experiences, not creating masterpieces that others will love but that say nothing meaningful.

Oh and by the way sacrament sounds bitter and self righteous.....it was insensitive and idiotic of him/her to criticize your personal experience and even more childish to try and defend it-they messed up and now they wont admit it.....

The OP didn't ask for others to evaluate it.

 

[Sacrament]

Oh and by the way sacrament sounds bitter and self righteous.....it was insensitive and idiotic of him/her to criticize your personal experience and even more childish to try and defend it-they messed up and now they wont admit it.....

No.