hey yall just felt like sharing my story cuz I love to read your stories.
So basically most of my ocd comes from all of the pets I own. I love them so much so it causes me to do obsessive things because I want to keep them safe. When I get home from school before getting anywhere near my pets I have to wash my hands extremely well because I am so terrified of other people and their germs. Usually this takes 10-15 minutes. Sometimes I feel like it wasn't good enough and that I have to redo the whole thing but I at least stop myself. However after cleaning my pet's water dish I feel like I did something wrong and I redo it until it feels right. It's difficult because first, I am terrified of germs, but I am also terrified of chemicals. Even though I use natural biodegradable soaps I am still afraid. So I end up rinsing their bowls forever until I feel all the chemicals are gone. I also have no trust in myself and worry I do things that I am unaware of, such as putting chemicals near my pets. Sometimes before bed I have to make sure I didn't leave my dogs outside in the cold, so I have to get out of bed and find them to make sure they are safe. But then even looking at my dogs, I doubt that I am seeing right. I think that I am seeing them but they are actually outside in the cold. And with that I go to sleep still suspicious and worried. I also repeatedly check to make sure my caged pets are closed in, because I worry that if the cage is open they will escape and harm themselves. I used to check every corner and inch of my room before going to sleep to make sure no bad guy broke into my house and is in my room trying to hurt my animals. I also check door locks often for this reason.
Most of these ocds I am working on to resolve without help. I have never needed help before. I have had ocd since 12 years old and I always in the end get rid of it until new ones come. For 2 years of adolescence I had no ocd at all. When I was younger I used to obsessively smooth out the carpet in my whole room before going to sleep, and I used to look up at the ceiling and check every corner. For what? I have no idea. I will most likely never have an ocd that feels complelely pointless like checking the ceiling ever again, but with my pet ocds it feels like it has value because my pets safetly is concerned. But in like all ocd cases it is pointless and I know that
So basically most of my ocd comes from all of the pets I own. I love them so much so it causes me to do obsessive things because I want to keep them safe. When I get home from school before getting anywhere near my pets I have to wash my hands extremely well because I am so terrified of other people and their germs. Usually this takes 10-15 minutes. Sometimes I feel like it wasn't good enough and that I have to redo the whole thing but I at least stop myself. However after cleaning my pet's water dish I feel like I did something wrong and I redo it until it feels right. It's difficult because first, I am terrified of germs, but I am also terrified of chemicals. Even though I use natural biodegradable soaps I am still afraid. So I end up rinsing their bowls forever until I feel all the chemicals are gone. I also have no trust in myself and worry I do things that I am unaware of, such as putting chemicals near my pets. Sometimes before bed I have to make sure I didn't leave my dogs outside in the cold, so I have to get out of bed and find them to make sure they are safe. But then even looking at my dogs, I doubt that I am seeing right. I think that I am seeing them but they are actually outside in the cold. And with that I go to sleep still suspicious and worried. I also repeatedly check to make sure my caged pets are closed in, because I worry that if the cage is open they will escape and harm themselves. I used to check every corner and inch of my room before going to sleep to make sure no bad guy broke into my house and is in my room trying to hurt my animals. I also check door locks often for this reason.
Most of these ocds I am working on to resolve without help. I have never needed help before. I have had ocd since 12 years old and I always in the end get rid of it until new ones come. For 2 years of adolescence I had no ocd at all. When I was younger I used to obsessively smooth out the carpet in my whole room before going to sleep, and I used to look up at the ceiling and check every corner. For what? I have no idea. I will most likely never have an ocd that feels complelely pointless like checking the ceiling ever again, but with my pet ocds it feels like it has value because my pets safetly is concerned. But in like all ocd cases it is pointless and I know that