LifeInternal88
Well-known member
Failure is subject to the measurement criteria. Change the criteria and you can become a winner without any actual change. I wonder if there is a way for us to live a quality life by our own standards. A lot of us feel depressed because we desire things that our nature cannot handle or attract. Now society is biased to favour extroverts and just the so called “normal” people in general. And so our critique of ourselves is based on this very biased view that leaves us feeling crappy. I just wonder if there was a way to change this valuation system, which has you valuing other things which could enrich your life too. Not to say that the things you desire now, like having more friends, or a partner don’t matter, but that you can introduce other things to strive for which lesson the relative importance of the social things you are failing at, at least for now.
Susan Cain has an interesting take on introversion for example. I haven’t read the book, but watched her TEDtalk. She points out that some of the greatest scientists, writers and religious figures in history were introverts. Introversion is a style of being and should be accepted as such, rather than favouring the extroverts and forcing the introvert to change, or worse labelling then with some demeaning name him and making him feel like an outcast weirdo. (I know not all of you are introverts, I was just making a point. You could be shy extrovert, in which case living life as an introvert – because of the anxiety – might not be satisfying. )
I’m NOT saying we should accept everything about ourselves, but that we should start with the idea that our nature is a style of being and it is OK. Then yes, learn some social skills and communications tools to make life easier, getting formal employment, family engagements, marriage, friendships. Rather than start with internalising the idea that we are weirdoes and suck to the nth degree. Recognise that it is weird loners that tend to be very inventive, that tend to be good writers and such. Recognise that you are worth something, and this lack is just one area of your life; which means you can still pursue a meaningful life.
Sorry if this has been said before : ) Nothing wrong with repetition right ?
Susan Cain has an interesting take on introversion for example. I haven’t read the book, but watched her TEDtalk. She points out that some of the greatest scientists, writers and religious figures in history were introverts. Introversion is a style of being and should be accepted as such, rather than favouring the extroverts and forcing the introvert to change, or worse labelling then with some demeaning name him and making him feel like an outcast weirdo. (I know not all of you are introverts, I was just making a point. You could be shy extrovert, in which case living life as an introvert – because of the anxiety – might not be satisfying. )
I’m NOT saying we should accept everything about ourselves, but that we should start with the idea that our nature is a style of being and it is OK. Then yes, learn some social skills and communications tools to make life easier, getting formal employment, family engagements, marriage, friendships. Rather than start with internalising the idea that we are weirdoes and suck to the nth degree. Recognise that it is weird loners that tend to be very inventive, that tend to be good writers and such. Recognise that you are worth something, and this lack is just one area of your life; which means you can still pursue a meaningful life.
Sorry if this has been said before : ) Nothing wrong with repetition right ?
