How are you feeling?

theslowesthand

theslowesthand

Banned
AtTheGates said:
anyway when it comes to authority figures abusing people, this is the kind of thing I'm talking about (btw if you're squeamish I recommend you not even watch this video)
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Looks like a great film - gotta be, with charlize theron in it! :bigsmile: :thumbup:
(i don't know who's hotter, amber heard or charlize theron :giggle:)
 
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theslowesthand

theslowesthand

Banned
Feeling cold today. Southerly icy-cold polar blast. Thunderstorms, hail, rain, windy, etc. Staying inside. Got heaters on. Having a warm cuppa & biscuits. Sure glad it's not a hurricane! (tho it has felt like the distant "outskirts" of one!) :)
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Like I was just put on this earth to suffer. :crying: Though I think me choking on my f*ckin' umbilical cord while still in the womb would've been grand in retrospect.

Oh, and I'm horribly forgetful, lately. Yesterday I did something for my mum, then about half an hour after, wondered if I'd done or not... But hey, extremely stress and highly unpleasant people have that affect on ye. :sad:
 
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H

Hot_Tamale

Well-known member
Graeme1988 said:
Like I was just put on this earth to suffer. :crying: Though I think me choking on my f*ckin' umbilical cord while still in the womb would've been grand in retrospect.

Oh, and I'm horribly forgetful, lately. Yesterday I did something for my mum, then about half an hour after, wondered if I'd done or not... But hey, extremely stress and highly unpleasant people have that affect on ye. :sad:
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I feel you on that 2nd half of your post. Everytime I'm at work I'll have to go to the back of the restaurant to get something and once I get there I can't remember what I went to get. I was in my truck getting ready to drive somewhere, I put my seatbelt on, started the engine, and then pressed the gas pedal. I wondered "why aren't I moving?" and then noticed the truck was still in park...I'm like you too because I will do tasks at work and then minutes later ask myself if I'd done it.
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Hot_Tamale said:
I feel you on that 2nd half of your post. Everytime I'm at work I'll have to go to the back of the restaurant to get something and once I get there I can't remember what I went to get. I was in my truck getting ready to drive somewhere, I put my seatbelt on, started the engine, and then pressed the gas pedal. I wondered "why aren't I moving?" and then noticed the truck was still in park...I'm like you too because I will do tasks at work and then minutes later ask myself if I'd done it.
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At least that's story is funnier. :giggle: Compared to me crumbling under the weight of a stressful situation. But responsibility for caring is always on my shoulders. I care for everyone but myself. :sad:

But yeah, I'm constantly reminding myself to do stuff, doing it, then wonder if I'd done it moments later. Like yesterday, I couldn't remember if took my dinner plate back downstairs to the kitchen once I was done eating, or if my mum took it when she came into my room while I had my headphones on, listening to music. :confused:
 
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Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Well, in middle of reading an online article on psychopaths, I realised I was raised by and around a group of them. No even f*ckin joking when I say that. Literally psychopaths. :eek:

Aside from that, I'm feeling the same as have been for the past month, except I've lost all the respect and admiration I once had for my mother. As well as giving up any hope of things ever getting better. :sad:
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Hate this feckin' narcissistic, instant gratification culture social media has created. This "Now, now, now! Look at me!" attention-who're mentality. Like being back in school and watching yer friends trying to outdo each as to who can do something more impressive.

And they say I'm anti-social. Well, thank f*ck if that's the case!
Cuz I wouldn't want be as self-centred and needy as people around me. F*ckin' bitches!

Sorry, that rant was sparked by my oldest sister pestering me to do something, when I'm too busy fixing my laptop. I don't need distractions right now. Piss off!
 
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defiance

defiance

Well-known member
I think I am ready for all of this to be done and over with. I couldn't make anything out of myself as an adult. I didn't establish a career and I can't do anything because of my issues which leads to letting the people around me down. I failed the game of life. I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror anymore either because the person I see is someone that I just can't stand. All of it is just too much. It will end one day but I am hoping that it is sooner rather than later.
 
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Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
It's... 5 o'clock in the morning?! :eek: F*ck... right off!! :kickingmyself:

Not been sleep much - Christ! You'd think I'm the one with 2 kids to raise. I'm feeling stressed, suicidal and cooped up in my own house. Part of me is kinda hoping this totally does my mum in, so I'll have an excuse to end it all, myself. :sad: Though, at this rate, it's more likely me that going to kill myself. :crying:
 
Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Well, in short, I just caused another family argument that wasn't my fault, but was. Just like what happened last month. :thumbdown: But hey, I've always been the scapegoat in my family. So, I just hoping I die in my sleep tonight. Please Gawd, just let it end!. :praying: Because I've seriously had enough of living this life. Cuz I am, and never will be good enough, ye see? No matter how selfless, kind, honest and caring I try to be towards others... It's never bloody enough. :crying: :sad:
It would appear those qualities are not well in today's Generation Me society

Come to think of it, I rarely thought about myself and my well-being until last year and the latter months of 2015.
 
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AtTheGates

AtTheGates

Banned
Iv noticed that ever since I worked at a prison, my tolerance for hurtful people and mean-spirited people has gone WAY down. I can't stand how people act likes its ok to screw with someone as long as they do it in an insidious way. The intention is the same whether its readily evident or NOT....Being a sh!tty person is still messed up even if you do it "under the table", so to speak. Kind of like when someone KNOWS your insecurities and they'll use them against you. In general, if you're a sh!tty person people will ALWAYS find out eventually.

reminds me of this video I saw a while back.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXf3cjNtuHg
 
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Graeme1988

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Well, I've just projectile vomitted into the bin at my bedside - twice with the space of an hour. :sad: I hate being sick. First-time, I didn't grab the bin quick enough and was sick down the side of my mum's bed and on her floor. Ew, gross! :eek: Now, I'm slightly afraid to try an get some sleep, in case it happens again. But as precaution, I'm lying on my side.

So now, my mum and I aren't feeling too well. And she did the same projectole vomiting in the bedside bin earlier in the evening when she asked if it'd be awrite if ah didnae stay up, and we went to our beds earlier than usual. And she just throw up over the bin, caught some of the bedside table as well.
 
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cappatown420

cappatown420

Well-known member
Having some tea, smoking a bowl, and wondering why am I still thinking of my ex after him leaving me 8 months ago.

Likely going to have a job in October, haven't worked in a year, or spoken to many people other than the mother and brother. My mental illness helped cause a rather large work gap on my resume. 3+ years of gaps

Been almost a year since last suicide attempt. Thinking me not being on meds is no longer an option in my life, I get too crazy without it. But I hate it.

Looking forward to the new season of The Walking Dead coming up in October!
 
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