Billiamair
New member
Hi I am a 19 year old college student from New Jersey. My entire life I have always been completely dependant on my parents or other people to take me from place to place. I am constantly lost even if I am two blocks from my house. This was normal until I reached about 10 years old and realized that other children would always know how to get back home from the grocery store, a friends house, wherever. Im almost 20 and still cant get back home from pretty much anywhere.
By the time I was 17 and getting my license my agoraphobia or whatever I have multiplied like 1000 times. The only place I could drive was to school which is two blocks away from my house, and it took a long time for me to memorize the route. My mom had to show me the way a countless number of times. I would be completely fine driving if I knew where I was going, so driving to school wasnt that bad.....but I would get stressed out that a friend might ask for a ride home and I would have to blow them off.
Once my friends started driving to each others houses instead of having their parents drop them off my social life turned to 0. I was forced to stay at home every day because I couldnt get to any of my friends houses on my own. I finished out high school a total outcast.....and I have no social anxiety at all.
Once I started college my parents showed me around the campus many times before I was comfortable enough to get to class, cafeteria, whatever. The only times I would go out would be if I was following a group of friends. No matter how close we were to campus, at an off-campus party or whatever I would NEVER know how to get back. I would pretend to be really drunk and use that as an excuse with my friends. Sometimes I would get a cab to pick me up and take me back to campus and I would find out it was 2 roads away.
It's my first summer back at home after starting college and since I have a social life at school I cant stand to sit around all summer in my house. I've already started to hang out with my old friends again, Ive been pretending my car is in the shop and having people pick me up and drop me off back home everywhere I go. When people are dropping me off at home, the only way I can direct them is to tell them to drive to our high school and then showing them the one route I know. I think in time I could learn my way around my whole town with MUCH MUCH effort......but when I think of driving to a yankee game or the city when I am a father it seems like an impossible task.
Sorry for the long post, I still have so much to say about my illness but hopefully some of you can tell me what I have or relate based upon my description.
By the time I was 17 and getting my license my agoraphobia or whatever I have multiplied like 1000 times. The only place I could drive was to school which is two blocks away from my house, and it took a long time for me to memorize the route. My mom had to show me the way a countless number of times. I would be completely fine driving if I knew where I was going, so driving to school wasnt that bad.....but I would get stressed out that a friend might ask for a ride home and I would have to blow them off.
Once my friends started driving to each others houses instead of having their parents drop them off my social life turned to 0. I was forced to stay at home every day because I couldnt get to any of my friends houses on my own. I finished out high school a total outcast.....and I have no social anxiety at all.
Once I started college my parents showed me around the campus many times before I was comfortable enough to get to class, cafeteria, whatever. The only times I would go out would be if I was following a group of friends. No matter how close we were to campus, at an off-campus party or whatever I would NEVER know how to get back. I would pretend to be really drunk and use that as an excuse with my friends. Sometimes I would get a cab to pick me up and take me back to campus and I would find out it was 2 roads away.
It's my first summer back at home after starting college and since I have a social life at school I cant stand to sit around all summer in my house. I've already started to hang out with my old friends again, Ive been pretending my car is in the shop and having people pick me up and drop me off back home everywhere I go. When people are dropping me off at home, the only way I can direct them is to tell them to drive to our high school and then showing them the one route I know. I think in time I could learn my way around my whole town with MUCH MUCH effort......but when I think of driving to a yankee game or the city when I am a father it seems like an impossible task.
Sorry for the long post, I still have so much to say about my illness but hopefully some of you can tell me what I have or relate based upon my description.