NickyNacker
Well-known member
I'm pretty sure I've written on here before about how lack of sleep makes my anxiety worse. I'm not sure why it does, but it does. It's like it makes my emotions more intense. I've been up for 33 hours. I couldn't sleep the other night and then I had to stay awake to go to a therapy session. After I got home I tried sleeping and couldn't. And I've been up ever since. It's like I get to a point where if I've been up too long, I can't sleep. I mean I always eventually fall asleep but it never takes this long. And every time I lay down I get this claustrophobic sensation and I have to sit up and turn on the light. And then I end up crying and shaking. I have this huge fear of not being able to sleep becuase of it making my anxiety worse and triggering panic attacks. And this would be my first attack since 2009. The fear of not being able to sleep is keeping me from sleeping. A million fears/negative thoughts are shooting through my mind all at the same time and it's so overwhelming and that's usually what ends up turning into the panic attack and I keep trying to tell myself out loud that everything is ok and that it's uncalled for and ridiculous but it just keeps happening. This post is such a ramble but I was desperate to get this out and I'm going crazy. I feel like there's a million things I'm not saying but I can't think of how to put the feelings into words. There's one horrible feeling in particular I can never describe. When I get that panicked feeling in the pit of my stomach I have this need to be near whoever is in the house.. It's this lonely terrifying feeling. Like I cannot be alone. I have to be near someone to feel better. Idk I'm just so confused/scared/frustrated.