Would being better looking reduce social anxiety

Tuukka40

Well-known member
I'm pretty confident in my looks and it doesn't help my shyness at all. So I definitely agree that it would only change your SA if that was why you had it in the first place. Or at least one of the reasons that you had it.
 

vj288

not actually Fiona Apple
if you can put that into a mathematical equation, i'll add it to my signature =^]

Okay, I gave it a go, the best I could do is using logic symbols, and I may have done it wrong. You decide if it counts ::p:


~(A ∵B)
B ∵A
~A ≠~B
⋄ ~B=~A
So, (focus on) ~B

Run down of symbols
~ Negation (not)
∵ because (the cause of)
⋄ it is possible that
 

coyote

Well-known member
Okay, I gave it a go, the best I could do is using logic symbols, and I may have done it wrong. You decide if it counts ::p:


~(A ∵B)
B ∵A
~A ≠~B
⋄ ~B=~A
So, (focus on) ~B

Run down of symbols
~ Negation (not)
∵ because (the cause of)
⋄ it is possible that

looks good to me

i was never that good at math, that's why i went to art school
 

Srijita52

Well-known member
Okay, I gave it a go, the best I could do is using logic symbols, and I may have done it wrong. You decide if it counts ::p:


~(A ∵B)
B ∵A
~A ≠~B
⋄ ~B=~A
So, (focus on) ~B

Run down of symbols
~ Negation (not)
∵ because (the cause of)
⋄ it is possible that

o_O
__________
 

Srijita52

Well-known member
Maybe it would to an extent but then again the person would still need to address their problems. Anyway its just something I'll never find out. :p
 

Swifty

Well-known member
Yeah, i the moments in life when i looked good people treated me different in a positive way. Nowadays i get the feeling that people are disguisted by me, whatever. So yeah, to look better i would have to work hard for it. But it takes so much energy....
 

razzle dazzle rose

Well-known member
Unfortunately I'm in the mindset that if I can just get to a certain weight or look a certain way that I'll be happy... When in reality, it's probably not true... I'll feel better about those aspects, but then my focus will just shift to something else.

That is how I am too. I have done things to improve/fix my appearance, and it did boost my self-esteem, but there is so much more that needs to be done. Feels like it will never end. What makes me upset though is that is possible to look better if only I put in more effort. But it is exhausting.

When I walk the streets, especially in the parts where people come to flaunt their appearance, I always see guys way more fashionable and way more in shape then I am and it makes me feel like I need a complete make-over haha. I get frustrated about my wardrobe especially.

Me too! Only, girls instead of guys. It can make me feel really self-conscious. It is worse if I see myself in the mirror. I am in need of new clothes asap. Sometimes I wish someone would nominate me for one of those makeover shows, haha...

I think feeling like you look good helps a lot with mood and confidence.

If I like the way I look, I will have a good day. But if I don't, it will be a bad day. Wearing something new that I like is a huge boost. Also having my hair and face look right. So, to answer the thread's question, looking the way I wanna look and having a great wardrobe would definitely help with my SA. It would, it would.
 

1BlackSheep

Well-known member
^^^ Ditto for me on everything RazzleDazzleRose said! If I have on a new outfit and am having a decent hair day, I feel better about myself. But, that whole feeling can be shattered in an instant if I encounter someone else better looking than me. ::(: And, as Swifty said, it takes a lot of energy!

I'm actually not sure if being better looking would help. When I was younger, I was better looking and still had the same anxieties/insecurities. What would help is if my mind was convinced that I looked better!
 
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MarionBerry

Well-known member
There are so many good looking people on this forum that I don't think being "unattractive" is the problem. It's the perception you have of yourself that is the problem.

But. I know I feel way hotter and confident when I wear my big black boots.
 
Wow RAZZLEDAZZLE, I have the same days!

Bad looking ~ Bad day , feeling awful .

(I focus on my hair being dry, I think my face looks disgusting, focus on every single imperfection, rinkles under my eyes (and i'm only just 20!!!), and my face shape is disgusting.)

Good looking ~ Awesome day

(New clothing, new hair colour, new haircut, always changes me for a week)
 

coyote

Well-known member
my social anxiety has more to do with my insides, but i don't exactly feel confident about my appearance either. i wish i looked more put together, that it came naturally, that i had a stronger desire to put more effort into my appearance. i know i'm not unattractive but i feel like i'm more on the side of bland. sometimes i wish that i was thought of as 'sexy' or 'gorgeous', but that's not really me. receiving heaps of attention because of my looks would make me feel self conscious. so... i might as well be the way i am right now.

quite a few people (myself included) find the natural, un-made-up, not-overly-put-together look very appealing and much sexier than the glamour girl thing

and you are gorgeous (i hope that doesn't make you too self conscious, sorry)
 

WeirdyMcGee

Well-known member
Confidence in yourself would be the only thing, I think-- that could reduce your social anxiety.
There are plenty of gorgeous, brilliant, interesting people in the world who are not confident and I'm sure it affects how they feel around other people; selfconscious or anxious.

'looking better' isn't the key-- it's 'feeling better' which can possibly come from positive reinforcement, exercise, a healthy diet, proper amount of sleep, etc.
 

JonSP

Well-known member
There are so many good looking people on this forum that I don't think being "unattractive" is the problem. It's the perception you have of yourself that is the problem.

I was looking for someone to say this. You're spot on :)
 
I honestly think if I looked different it would help me. My social anxiety would still be there but my deep depression and existential anxiety wouldn't be.

I don't think I'm ugly - but I'm 21 and look about 16 (sometimes younger, sometimes older, depending on what I'm wearing, hair, makeup, etc.); I'm also shorter and I have small hands and feet, which I think contribute to this overall young look and I feel self-conscious about my hands.

It's weird because I've been told I look great without makeup by more than one person, but then on the other hand I get shocked looks when I tell them I am 21 (22 next month!). So it's a love-hate feeling towards my appearance, but... meh. Looks are important but they aren't what make a human life, well, a human life. Take them for what they are I suppose. It's kind of odd if you think about it, how no one chooses what they look like and yet they are judged so strongly for it. Nature is strange.

Anyway, young-looking I can deal with, but if I could change one thing about myself it would be my hands. I just think they are too small (many people here already know that by now :rolleyes:).
 
As far as anyone with social anxiety feeling better with better looks... Well, it depends where the anxiety stemmed from. FROM thinking you look bad or from a deep sense of inferiority or something?

I really think it all depends, it is not a matter of simply "yes" or "no".
 

OceanMist

Well-known member
I personally think I'm a 6 on a 1-10 scale. It helps a little, but it's not like a huge difference with my SA.

The thing is that SA comes from fear of lack of social ability and not having anything to say, that kind of stuff. My body just isn't a social engine, so I am what I am, you know?

People don't always just see looks. They can look at social ability too.

I think that it's harder for a man to be beautiful anyway. A guy has to be like at least an 8 out of 10 on the looks scale to be able to just thrive on his looks by themself.
 
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