women have all the rights...

no1

no1

Banned
women have all the rights... afraid to approach

it makes me afraid to approach any girl for fear that anything i do will be perceived as harassment.

Don't get me wrong I do approach but it takes major freaking balls because it has to be done the right way, otherwise it = death.
 
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SickJoke

SickJoke

Well-known member
no1 said:
it makes me afraid to approach any girl for fear that anything i do will be perceived as harassment.
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If you approach her with that frame of mind, then you're going to act like it's harassment. If you approach her with the frame that it's just a playful conversation, you might even have fun.

no1 said:
Don't get me wrong I do approach but it takes major freaking balls because it has to be done the right way, otherwise it = death.
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I agree it does take balls, but let's be reasonable here. Does rejection = death? No, at the very worst it's a moment of discomfort. After that you can separate the emotion and observe the interaction scientifically. There's no such thing as failure, only feedback.
 
no1

no1

Banned
no at it's very worst it's not just a moment of discomfort lol that is not the worst that can happen.
 
marciaX3

marciaX3

Well-known member
i'm curious about HOW ur approaching girls if u think anything u do could be considered harassment. i mean, r u grabbing their ass before u even say a word to them? r u saying something possibly offensive as ur first words to her? if ur not doing anything like this, then i don't see how it could be considered legit harassment.

also, there r some girls who just don't want to be bothered, they could very well be committed to someone already, they could be lesbians, they could just be having a crappy day... it all depends.
 
TooShyShy

TooShyShy

Well-known member
The worst thing???? I am with Sick Joke here, more than some discomfort and (yes, rejection is a bit of a set back and that sux) and you can feel badly for a time but that does not equal death..nothing equals that!!!!!!

And i also agree, unless you are touching them or being verbally lude...how is asking someone for the time..or a cup of coffee harrassment?
 
SickJoke

SickJoke

Well-known member
no1 said:
one can be landed in jail
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You can't be put in jail for talking to someone. What law are you breaking? If you approach them and they say **** off, you walk away. It's not a big deal, and it's definitely not against the law.

no1 said:
or beat up for showing interest
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The chances of that happening are so small that you shouldn't even consider it a possibility. As you read this sentence, the ceiling above you might collapse and kill you instantly - that doesn't prevent you from sitting under a roof. All you're doing is talking, you won't get beat up for that.
 
no1

no1

Banned
I'm also afraid of showing interest because I might scare the woman. sexual or romantic interest is not something to be taken lightly. neither is just "wanting friendship" or "a relationship".

People just want things to happen naturally, almost as if forced upon them. Or like... "god" just set it up to happen. Unless perhaps you're at a club or bar and ppl are drunk, but even then sexual interest nor romantic nor any kind of Desire in general is unacceptable. It is stalker-ish behaviour, it is abnormal.

Just wanting any kind of relationship with anyone is too much to ask for. It has to happen naturally.

Maybe it's because I'm predatory. ie that I've never had too many relationships (in general) with anyone, male or female (i'm talking about friendships here for the males) such that I actually am sort of "desperate" for any kind of interaction.

Yea ok, desperation. It sucks. So is any kind of desire. Desire is wrong.

I'm not just "desperate". I in fact physiologically need it. I dont just desire it. I need it for fulfillment and knowledge. Or else I will always be an inexperienced and bothersome fellow.
 
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j_brown2

j_brown2

Banned
it doesn't equal death, Iam sorry if you read any of my posts and I confused some people lol... my issue is loneliness... walking in a bar or approaching a girl is a big no, I feel so lonely, estranged, disconnected with everything than I start fearing of doing something wrong, saying something or whatever coz that would make me feel even more lonely
 
Havocan

Havocan

Well-known member
When girls reject you consider it their loss. They don't even know what they're missing. They were probably not worth wasting your time on in the first place either.
 
SickJoke

SickJoke

Well-known member
no1 said:
I'm also afraid of showing interest because I might scare the woman.
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That's why you need to approach her as if you're just making friendly conversation. If she shows interest in you, then you can show her interest in return.

no1 said:
sexual or romantic interest is not something to be taken lightly. neither is just "wanting friendship" or "a relationship".
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It's not as big of a deal as you think.

no1 said:
People just want things to happen naturally, almost as if forced upon them.
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Define "naturally." Socializing is natural. You're allowed to walk up to people and start talking to them, there's nothing unnatural about that.

You're making too much of this.
 
j_brown2

j_brown2

Banned
when a woman rejects me it's not the end (depends on how I feel that day), it's only the beginning... It's like Iam being unleashed,I got nothing to lose anymore, I get in a different state of mind... I get all psycho on her and start enjoying myself, I don't give a flying **** about her then, I play with her emotions, I just see her as an object or how should I explain, I don't know what it is... I used to do this all the time when I was high on weed, and I still can get in this state even though I have SA. It's great though, I think it's somekind of mania though, playing table tennis gets me always in this state haha, I think I could beat the best table tennis player in the world if we were allowed to talk between the game, I would mentally destroy him haha

Ok enough of me, gotta go and drink some orange juice to cool down
 
TooShyShy

TooShyShy

Well-known member
If more men ''naturally'' or ''casually'' approached me INSTAED OF standing away from me--across a room--staring intently at me (making me self conscious really) it could be a great thing.

If you make it a big deal its going to feel like a big DIFFICULT deal..if you look at it as an easy, comfortable transaction between two people, then it will be..it can be if you think of it that way.

They say what you think about (or obsess about) is what shows up in your nature; attitude, body language, etc.
 
Psychedelicious

Psychedelicious

1
My face is itchy

A lot of what you're saying, I have no idea what the hell it means. It's soo confusingI guess some of it makes sense, but it sounds so irrational and illogical. I think you are taking things that might have some truth to them and twisting them and making them totally outrageous. Like seriously. "one can be landed in jail" That's hardly even possible man. If you are going to waste your time worrying and overthinking stuff like that, that's like not going to get you anywhere. More then there is an actually problem, you seem to be making the problem. Not you making the problem by the way you're acting, but by thinking this way and making up all these complicated problems about probably unimportant details.
 
madmike

madmike

Well-known member
Yeah, it's not all you're making it out to be. You just need to realize that most females (in my experience) are kind, understanding and compassionate beings (much more so than most males lol) and aren't there to incriminate you and sue you for sexual harrassment. It is hard, but you just have to think that if you're rejected at least you tried, and if you keep trying chances are that you'll eventually succeed! Come on, there's millions of them :D
 
j_brown2

j_brown2

Banned
Iam sorry... anyway I think I can relate, I can relate Iam thinking of those kind of things too, the sexual harrasment when I talk to someone, that I will be accused of it, it's somekind of OCD I believe, like I can't also talk to young children, especially girls coz I fear everyone will think Iam a pedo maniac lol... I got no advice, it's unreal the thinking that's all I know but doesn't help much either... Take some medz maybe?
 
j_brown2

j_brown2

Banned
J_brown shove that ****in gay advise up your ass... you wanna get people hooked on drugs huh? Your an animal jbrown
 
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