Rainman
Well-known member
I don't literally mean fighting. I am referring to the fight or flea/flight response, that is when you are in a crisis situation, you either escape it or you stand and fight. In the case of SA or SP, most of us escape those situations that cause us these feelings and confine ourselves to a comfort zone.
I have decided to stay and fight. It is not easy, I feel uncomfortable, I can set myself up for every awkward situations, have probably sabotaged my reputation and its leaving me thinking about it the whole day. I don't try to make it look obvious that I am actually anxious to my peers at work, I end up putting on a facade of confidence. This is what is called "Faking it, till you make it"
The problem is, I think that I am starting to come across as arrogant, patronizing and not nice. I am trying to simulate confidence, and I end up saying and doing things that are not really me and I am creating false impressions of me. I have caught myself doing it(or I just think I am doing it) and I am afraid that I am digging a hole for myself and might turn people against me.
I already know that two of my co-workers don't like me, and I may have inadvertently made a wrong impression on them.
I unconsciously tend to blurt out negative things, share too much information than is necessary and talk too much. I've also noticed that a part of me can actually talk down to people, ignore what they saying, just so that I don't become too soft to them and can maintain their respect for me. Sometimes the opposite, I will allow myself to be talked down too. I tend to smile and laugh a lot, when I don't actually want to laugh and smile. It's as if my face just contorts automatically.
In general I just don't feel like myself with people anymore. It makes me really uncomfortable. Sometimes, I just feel like just leaving or going to another place and starting over. But I want to stay and fight. I've done enough fleaing!
I have decided to stay and fight. It is not easy, I feel uncomfortable, I can set myself up for every awkward situations, have probably sabotaged my reputation and its leaving me thinking about it the whole day. I don't try to make it look obvious that I am actually anxious to my peers at work, I end up putting on a facade of confidence. This is what is called "Faking it, till you make it"
The problem is, I think that I am starting to come across as arrogant, patronizing and not nice. I am trying to simulate confidence, and I end up saying and doing things that are not really me and I am creating false impressions of me. I have caught myself doing it(or I just think I am doing it) and I am afraid that I am digging a hole for myself and might turn people against me.
I already know that two of my co-workers don't like me, and I may have inadvertently made a wrong impression on them.
I unconsciously tend to blurt out negative things, share too much information than is necessary and talk too much. I've also noticed that a part of me can actually talk down to people, ignore what they saying, just so that I don't become too soft to them and can maintain their respect for me. Sometimes the opposite, I will allow myself to be talked down too. I tend to smile and laugh a lot, when I don't actually want to laugh and smile. It's as if my face just contorts automatically.
In general I just don't feel like myself with people anymore. It makes me really uncomfortable. Sometimes, I just feel like just leaving or going to another place and starting over. But I want to stay and fight. I've done enough fleaing!