Trying to learn how to get over being shy...

in the bedroom.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 months; it's a long distance relationship, and we see each other when we can (on weekends if money and plane tickets are cheap) and he said that he wants someone sexually creative in bed.

I'm not fat, but I do have meat on my bones, and I have curves, but I do get really shy. He's really good to me and says sweet things, it's just really hard to do things (be on top) as creative as he wants without feeling somewhat...weird and uncomfortable due to lack of confidence and self-assurance.

Can someone help me and explain how to maybe grow out of this shy phase and learn that it's okay to be creative in the bedroom without making a complete fool of myself?

Thanks.

Maybe explore yourself more sexually on your own? So you will be more comfortable with your body and such. Self-confidence/self esteem is maybe another issue to address.

First of all I hope you dont take this the wrong way but you friend doesnt sound to sensitive to your situation. I mean he knew what he was getting into;So, why does he seem to want a hoar all of a sudden.

Also I think the only way to get past your discomfort is to change boyfriend. He doesnt seem to be doing a good job of relaxing you.

I wish you the best of luck and think you might want to slow down a bit cause this guy sounds like he is pushing you.

TAMPA-BAY said:

I mean he knew what he was getting into;So, why does he seem to want a hoar all of a sudden.

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OK first of all, being "sexually creative" does not mean whore.

Also I think the only way to get past your discomfort is to change boyfriend. He doesnt seem to be doing a good job of relaxing you.

I wish you the best of luck and think you might want to slow down a bit cause this guy sounds like he is pushing you.

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it doesn't sound like she is being pushed at all. she just wants to loosen up more.

anyways, from one female to another i know exactly what you mean. for a female, being on top makes you feel incredibly vulnerable... or just... put on the spot. i wish i had advice. i honestly don't think [most of] the males here understand what it is like so hopefully we get more female input on this topic.

Hey, hun, that's something normal and I hope I can help a lil. Well, to be honest all women feel that way in a certain part of their lives,I dont know if you're very new at sex, but if you are then it is more normal to feel that way. I will tell you something that is true, if you boyfriend is with you, he definitely finds you attractive and anything you do wether you feel weird or not he wont find it bad. Try to not even think about if it looks right or not. Think a lil about yourself and he'll go nuts. Your body is beautiful and sacred, hun, he loves it and you should too. I know it sounds easier than it is. Just let yourself go. When u r on top close ur eyes and think of your own pleasure. There's nothing he'll find sexier than that. The man who's with you never finds the little imperfections that you think you have. Try also walking arond him naked, believe me is a great teraphy to just get up and walk to the bathroom-for a water or whatever and give him a lil peak and it helps your self confidence with you body and of course, they find it sexy. Hope this can help you a little bit. the best to you.

Aaryn_Frost said:

in the bedroom.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 months; it's a long distance relationship, and we see each other when we can (on weekends if money and plane tickets are cheap) and he said that he wants someone sexually creative in bed.

I'm not fat, but I do have meat on my bones, and I have curves, but I do get really shy. He's really good to me and says sweet things, it's just really hard to do things (be on top) as creative as he wants without feeling somewhat...weird and uncomfortable due to lack of confidence and self-assurance.

Can someone help me and explain how to maybe grow out of this shy phase and learn that it's okay to be creative in the bedroom without making a complete fool of myself?

Thanks.

Click to expand...

i can understand that exat same thing which is exatly why i have never been on top.. and past bf's have seen me walk around naked and theyves tryed to make me feel comftlble but i really cant cope with been ontop it makes me feel too exposed and vunrable.. the closest ive got was sitting on him while hes lying down... which i think is really close... i supose if me and him never broke up ... i would have entully got there.. take small steps and work up to it if you find it easyer... lie ontop of him cuddling .. and work up to sitting up.. and just talking... it will get you used to him looking up at you like that and eventully you might feel confident enought to be ontop propperly