"You chose to be like this".

LonelyWonders

Well-known member
It's especially a bitter feeling when your parents follow up with something like, "Oh we've had problems too, that doesn't mean we chose something like this, it means we chose to get over it", or worse, "Our parents were worse than we are, we had it even worse and got over it, you don't know what that's like."

Personally at this point I'm realizing that for me (I'm only specifying me, I'm not saying this is the case with everyone with social phobia, or anything), I kind of did choose this path that eventually led me to become social phobic, to run away from everyone and everything that was causing me problems. But it's not like at the time I saw another option to choose.

Nor is this ever a helpful thing to say, at least in my experience, all it does is guilt-trip the social phobic into feeling like a bad/worse person.

In a way many "chose" to be like this, but you can't really call it a true choice when your backed up against a wall.
I could of chosen something different, but I was almost forced to be like this, no matter how much that sounds like i'm trying to blame everybody else.
 

Shant

Well-known member
In a way many "chose" to be like this, but you can't really call it a true choice when your backed up against a wall.
I could of chosen something different, but I was almost forced to be like this, no matter how much that sounds like i'm trying to blame everybody else.
I think that "backed up against a wall" was what I was going for when I said that I didn't see any other option to choose. :p

I almost want to blame myself for being like this so I don't sound like I'm trying to blame everyone else. Although doing that doesn't really help or anything, either...
 

LonelyWonders

Well-known member
I think that "backed up against a wall" was what I was going for when I said that I didn't see any other option to choose. :p

I almost want to blame myself for being like this so I don't sound like I'm trying to blame everyone else. Although doing that doesn't really help or anything, either...

Theres no good place for blame, except on the side. :)
 
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