Who to blame?

Reaching-Zen

Well-known member
I heard a 2 hour self help audio on overcoming your blushing problems and it more or less explains no one is to blame but ourselves. Its very indepth, and reveals the deep problem from all aspects, and offers some great tips.

The bottom line is, we care too much about what others think of us, we often have a low self esteem, we beat ourselves up about our latest ''incident'', we try very hard to suppress or stop our blushing spell, only to increase it, and very often, we have fair skin to add to it.

Its quite an eye opener, for me, I think its very true. Now my goal is to reverse all my current thoughts, to gradually reduce my blushing fits, then to eventually not blush. Its going to take alot of mental work, but I have no choice. I alienate myself from most events. I dread parties, weddings, going to other peoples places for dinner, etc, etc.

I need to improve all aspects of my life, including alot of self discipline, learn to not care what others think of me, say to myself who cares if I blush and not suppress it but let it go, and worst, learn to love myself more. 8O I certainly do not love myself, so how on earth am I meant to start this complete mental overturn?

This is very big for me. Ive suffered for 20 years now, I think. It will be easy for me to say its all too hard, but if I continue with this for another 20 years, I'd rather not be here. It sound stupid, but its true. I have no choice but to start my new lifestyle. I always believed martial arts could help me with my problem, and after listening to this audio, I'm more convinced than ever. I just haven't done it long enough. That alone is not the answer, but its a large part.

Thanks for listening. I hope I can be of some comfort to others suffering the same.
 
Good on you mate. Sounds like you've got the right attitude for overcoming your problem and sounds like you will.

Lot's of blushing sufferers tend to have what I think of as "reverse Narcissism".

Narcissists tend to think they're awesome and that the world revolves around them

Blushers tend to think that they're terrible and each time they blush think the whole world is staring at them.

In reality both sets of people are being delusional and are actually focusing on themselves too much.
 

Reaching-Zen

Well-known member
RedBlusher989 said:
In reality both sets of people are being delusional and are actually focusing on themselves too much.

This is awesome. You are so accurate its not funny. We blushers think people will think bad of us, or think they are heavily focusing on us or are really interested in us when in reality, most couldn't care if you blush or not, think you are just shy, not even care that you're shy, and certainly not think much about you because people often think only of themselves.

We blushers focus on ourselves too much, that is, our blushing thoughts.

The bottom line is, apart from your partner, family and close friends, people are so self absorbed they dont really care about you.
So think about this alot, and it really helps you blush less, at least it did for me.


NO ONE CARES IF YOU BLUSH.
 
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