School vs. Fun

Angie_05

Well-known member
#1
I really want to finish my education because I want a particular career so badly. I don't want to be older and unhappy with my job.

But on the other hand school is keeping me from doing a lot of things. Like I can't be where my boyfriend is right now. He's my best friend and gives me all my happiness. I can't be in a city that has more to do. I can't be away from my family because my school is near them (which would be nice to relieve some stress.) I can't just travel whenever I want to. I can't get away from this city where I grew up, where all my painful memories are.

What if something happened to me tomorrow and I died and had never gone out and had any fun.

What are your goals and ambitions? What is the most important thing you want to accomplish (relationships, career, traveling?)
 

Fighter86

Well-known member
#2
Maybe u could transfer to another school where u can be near ur boyfriend? If u don mind me asking, why can't u travel? Ur parents don allow? Or financial contrains?

As to the 2nd part of ur post, the part about my goals...well, my goals include:

-completing my education (which is on hold coz of SA & I'm startin to have doubts as to will I be able to complete it)

- have some sort of personal achievement like doing regular volunteer work, reach my target weight(which I am far from & have major problems achieving :roll: ), pretty much any sort of achievement that doesn't make me feel as if I have wasted my life. Something which I have done over the past 3 years or so..

- to make my SA better

Most important thing I want to achive right now?

- Have a boyfriend. I am not usually a relationship freak, but because I don't really exactly have many friends, I thought that having a special someone will allow me to do fun things with, have some sort of company, something like that..
 

black_mamba

Well-known member
#3
Angie_05 said:
What if something happened to me tomorrow and I died and had never gone out and had any fun.
Studying is one of the few times in our lives where we must put a lot on hold in order to gain more in the future. But that doesn't mean we can't have fun sometimes, it just means that we need to be sensible in regulating our lives so that our education comes first.

I personally think its worth a few years of torment in order to be set up for a career you'd be passionate about in the future.

But on the other hand school is keeping me from doing a lot of things. Like I can't be where my boyfriend is right now. He's my best friend and gives me all my happiness. I can't be in a city that has more to do. I can't be away from my family because my school is near them (which would be nice to relieve some stress.) I can't just travel whenever I want to. I can't get away from this city where I grew up, where all my painful memories are.
Isn't there a halfway point i.e. moving away from the locality that depresses you yet still be fairly close enough in order to travel easily to see both your family and your partner? That's exactly what I did, move from one side to the city to the other. It's close, yet far, if you see what I mean. Close enough to visit every month but far away enough to forget about where I grew up and the memories surrounding it. The only difference with me is that I found my partner where I study, so thats a bonus! How often do you get to see each other?
 

Angie_05

Well-known member
#4
Hey guys, thanks for responding. Basically to visit my boyfriend would take 24 hours to drive there. The reason I am cautious to transfer schools is because I am grad school bound, and teacher recommendations are a very critical part of being accepted. Right now I need 3 good recommendations, and with SA I have finally, after 3 years, gotten more involved with 3 of my teachers.

I'm afraid that if I transfer, I will lose this benefit. Having SA makes it hard for me to get close to school faculty and other students. I'm also not sure how financial aid will work if I transfer because I have already been granted $5000 for the whole year at my current school.

Now the situation is really serious because my boyfriend asked me today to seriously look into transferring, because we are both miserable with the current living situation. he tells me to stop thinking about what my family thinks and to do what I want. I don't want to let my family down by leaving them when I was trying to strengthen my relationships with some of them. And I don't want to jeopardize my future. I'm not sure if it looks bad on records to transfer during senior year. On the other hand, I desperately want to be with him and start a new life on the other side of the country.

So that is my dilemma.
 

Angie_05

Well-known member
#5
Fighter86 said:
Maybe u could transfer to another school where u can be near ur boyfriend? If u don mind me asking, why can't u travel? Ur parents don allow? Or financial contrains?

As to the 2nd part of ur post, the part about my goals...well, my goals include:

-completing my education (which is on hold coz of SA & I'm startin to have doubts as to will I be able to complete it)
I understand the SA/school dilemma. I have worked so hard to gain credibility although being extremely shy.

- have some sort of personal achievement like doing regular volunteer work, reach my target weight(which I am far from & have major problems achieving :roll: ), pretty much any sort of achievement that doesn't make me feel as if I have wasted my life. Something which I have done over the past 3 years or so..
this i am having trouble with myself. I want to get my body in shape but it's so hard to find the motivation to do it, especially with my current depression over the boyfriend situation.

- to make my SA better

Most important thing I want to achive right now?

- Have a boyfriend. I am not usually a relationship freak, but because I don't really exactly have many friends, I thought that having a special someone will allow me to do fun things with, have some sort of company, something like that..
Yes having a significant other who you can really open up to gives you a feeling of comfort and fulfillment. I urge you to be cautious, because in my situation, I let him be my everything. SA kept me from having involvement other than him and a few friends. Now that he is living far away, my loneliness has come back full strength. I wish I had worked on my self-esteem before getting involved.
 

black_mamba

Well-known member
#6
Why can't your boyfriend move towards you instead Angie?

I bet your heart is telling you that you should stick with it, how much longer before you're finished completely with education??
 

Angie_05

Well-known member
#7
black_mamba said:
Why can't your boyfriend move towards you instead Angie?

I bet your heart is telling you that you should stick with it, how much longer before you're finished completely with education??
Actually my boyfriend was living here. He just left to take advantage of some opportunities over there. He absolutely will not come back.

I think I have a year and a half left of school. My heart is telling me two different things: Be with him and complete your education!
 
Top