Re: When did your social anxiety start?

Shyguest

Well-known member
#1
Re: When did your social anxiety start?

Hi,

Have you always had a social anxiety or shyness related condition? Or can you pinpoint a certain time when it began.
 
#3
I've always been painfully shy my whole life. I started getting panic attacks when I was 15 and not until I was about 22 it started to affect my way of life.
 
#4
I started getting anxious in certain situations when i was about 16,when i was 18 it hit me hard.But i think i always had a lack of social skills and communication problems.
 

Shyguest

Well-known member
#5
Hi,

Do you feel as though your interests don't fit in with other people's or others kids when you were at school?

When I was at school, I can't understand why I never went through a rebellious stage at the right time. I've always been a few years behind like that. It really affected me and I was always trying to prove that I was as grown up as anyone else.
 

qipuqipu

Well-known member
#6
I've always been shy. There were some particular moments of my childhood that gave me a feeling of paranoia towards other people's motives, but I never suffered too badly from it until about 2-3 years ago (when I was about 16).
 

Cark

New member
#8
Mine all started when I went to secondary (high) school. I guess I wanted to do my best at every subject but their were too many. I guess I couldn't keep up with my own standards so it caused me to crack up because I couldn't keep up. I guess I was struggling to fit in, because I was cheeky, but geeky with my glasses the size of my head and I looked young for my age. Soon after starting the second year, I started to get irrational about things. I think that was when OCD kicked in and I started obsessing that I was a bad person.... a bully and a cheat, which couldn't have been further from the truth. I stopped going to school in the April of 94 and I stayed at home all day, or followed my mum into work. I saw a few psychiatrists and was put into a young persons (mental) home in about June time of 1994. It didn't do much for me, but it was great to be around similar people. In the January of 1995 I went back to a new school and it's been hard since. I had few friends, none at all at first and I was avoidant of all things social. I'm almost 25 and I still don't know what to do job wise. In one of my previos jobs, I even used to sit in the toilet during the lunch hour in order to avoid eating with my coworkers. I don't really want to isolate myself.... Its like I'm just compulsed to do so to save myself from the physical and mental symptoms of panic and worry. I have made considerable progress lately however... I think that when you really WANT things to change, you'll find a way. I think it's just those baby steps each day that are important. You can't climb everest in a day, but you can do little things to combat SP and they soon build up. Its a good feeling when you exceed your own expectations :p
 

Shyguest

Well-known member
#9
Hi,

Do you think that diet and exercise can have a big effect on someone's self-esteem and confidence, which in turn helps to cope with social anxiety?

I can't seem to motivate myself to do these things though.
 

jayfan

Well-known member
#12
i feel ive always been like this . is it possible that ppl are born with this ? for as long as i can remember ive been extremely shy- i dont even talk to ppl in my family . my mother has told me that ever since i was little i never talked. only when i was hungry or wanted something- that she would ask me question about school and i would practically ignore her.( yes i know theres a difference between being shy and having sa. - ive always been scared and anxious during social situations even as a kid)
 

IceLad

Well-known member
#13
I was always shy as a kid, but in my teenage years, after a lot of negative events e.g. bullying, I think that was when I developed full blown social phobia.
 

Reholla

Well-known member
#14
My life in a nutshell:

VERY shy when I was little...but since ppl thought I was cute, they were like AWW cute! Shes shy!...(thats not bad, like shyness isnt always a bad thing. I kinda liked being shy. Actually I just noticed ppl who were extroverted were usually idiots). So by shy, I mean like I would hid behind my dad's pant leg if I didnt know you.

But I had friends, and I was happy. I was really lucky b/c I remember my childhood as a really happy time. And I have encouraging teachers, and good friends.

So from like 10-14 I became more extroverted. And i really wouldnt even consider myself shy at this point. But somewhere along in HS (I guess when public speaking became more present in classes), I had specific anxiety AKA, talking in front of others. I still had a lot of friends, and mind you, I was still really happy. But to myself I just "ok i will just get better w/ practice w/ public speaking." Which was a good attitude to have. But it just wasnt that simple.

To make a long story short, this specific anxiety "snowballs" into social anxiety, then eventually to generalized anxiety, where I couldnt call to order pizza.

Its slowly getting better. It takes a lot of time and patience.
 

SongOfSongs

Well-known member
#15
The question all hinges on whether social phobia is product of genetics or environment or both. As a little kid, I was really talkative; not shy at all. I noticed being "shy" starting at age 12. I really don't know if I developed it as a response to environmental factors or if I've had it (albeit in a dormant state) since birth or if it's some combination of wide-ranging factors. So, basically, I have no idea what causes me to be a social phobic or when I became one.
 

Quixote

Well-known member
#16
I have very clear memories of me being 4 or so and having clear symptoms of SP and probably depression as well. I remember being in kindergarten and being worried about being made fun of, or bullied, by other childred. Furthermore, I don't remember ever having been truly "happy" in my life. It always went from feeling melancholic to just indifferent. Or somewhat happy but with a distinct feeling that it was going to be over soon, always.

I had a few friends in the past (now I am practically friendless) but I always felt it would not last, because each once of them was very important to me, but I was not important for any of them. My best friend probably thought of me just like an acquaitance of his. I don't blame him for this, and it was such a long time ago anyway.
 

Shyguest

Well-known member
#17
Quixote,

Thank you for your input on this subject. It sounds as though your sa has really held you from achieving your desires. I can relate to several things you have said, about being afraid to be bullied at school and stuff like that. Don't you agree that you are actually afraid even if it never happens?

Keep writing about it and it could help you.
 

dzerklis

Well-known member
#18
ive always been shy, since i remember myself, and always have had symptoms of sp, but since i started coping about half a year ago im slowly getting better, now its just a matter of time and persistance yaaaaay :)
 

Quixote

Well-known member
#19
Hi Shyguest, yes like you say it is all in my head, nothing of that sort has happened at least since I was 16, which means quite a few years ago. But character unfortunately forms when we are younger, and I think it depends a lot on upbringing and... luck :)
 

Shyguest

Well-known member
#20
Hi,

I am one of these people that enjoys escapism activities such as reading fiction and watching movies as it somehow helps with the depression.
 
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