MotherWolff
Banned
Ok. So today didn't go at all like I planned. I wanted to go to the gym. Instead I stayed in my room most of the day and ate Chinese Food, which I wish I continued to avoid.
I wouldn't have had to eat it if it weren't for my dad telling me when he juices I can't use the kitchen until he is done. That is a 4 plus hour wait. I had not eaten since 7am by the time he began juicing at 1pm, the same time I was going to eat lunch.
I became so hungry by 3pm that I ordered some Chinese Food.
My Dad said I was full of it and that me not being able to access the kitchen was a poor excuse for ordering Chinese Food. He said if I just asked he would have said ok, IF he said yes. Then he said the worst he could have said was no. But it wouldn't have been a yes at all or even a simple no.
He would have either yelled, "Don't you see me juicing!? I dont have time to wait for you to make your food. You will get in my way! You are so slow!"
He said it all the other times I asked. Why should this time be any different?
I think Dad doesn't like me because he speaks so nicely to complete strangers or his coworkers(especially if they are Caucasian).
But when it comes to his own family, even his wife(who is not my mom) he will talk to us like we are stupid shitheads.
He blames me for everything. He even blamed me for getting molested by my ex-stepbrother at the age of 8. Yet father was the one who left me alone with a bunch of white people I hardly knew who called me many racial slurs.
I guarantee I wouldn't be here right now if my brother was not with me thru those hard times.
Father basically makes me feel like a failure, but he is the failure. He failed to protect his daughter and son.
Father beat up both of my bros so bad I have nightmares about it to this day.
I can't stand father. I want to avoid him as much as I can. Its kinda hard when I live with him though.
Hopefully after some sleep, I will feel better.
I have even wrote down a list of do's and don'ts for father a couple of days ago.
I feel like I can never be prepared or avoid confrontation with him.
So I will significantly minimize how often I speak to him and how often I am in his prescence.
Normally I would say I could care less what someone thinks.....but he is my dad.....no, my father.....I thought I was special to him being his little baby girl......I guess not anymore. :'(
I have nothing against all white people. Just the ones who hurt me as a child. My neighbor is white and I love her like she was my own grandmother. She is as sweet as can be. So I never want to get on her bad side. Lol.
I wouldn't have had to eat it if it weren't for my dad telling me when he juices I can't use the kitchen until he is done. That is a 4 plus hour wait. I had not eaten since 7am by the time he began juicing at 1pm, the same time I was going to eat lunch.
I became so hungry by 3pm that I ordered some Chinese Food.
My Dad said I was full of it and that me not being able to access the kitchen was a poor excuse for ordering Chinese Food. He said if I just asked he would have said ok, IF he said yes. Then he said the worst he could have said was no. But it wouldn't have been a yes at all or even a simple no.
He would have either yelled, "Don't you see me juicing!? I dont have time to wait for you to make your food. You will get in my way! You are so slow!"
He said it all the other times I asked. Why should this time be any different?
I think Dad doesn't like me because he speaks so nicely to complete strangers or his coworkers(especially if they are Caucasian).
But when it comes to his own family, even his wife(who is not my mom) he will talk to us like we are stupid shitheads.
He blames me for everything. He even blamed me for getting molested by my ex-stepbrother at the age of 8. Yet father was the one who left me alone with a bunch of white people I hardly knew who called me many racial slurs.
I guarantee I wouldn't be here right now if my brother was not with me thru those hard times.
Father basically makes me feel like a failure, but he is the failure. He failed to protect his daughter and son.
Father beat up both of my bros so bad I have nightmares about it to this day.
I can't stand father. I want to avoid him as much as I can. Its kinda hard when I live with him though.
Hopefully after some sleep, I will feel better.
I have even wrote down a list of do's and don'ts for father a couple of days ago.
I feel like I can never be prepared or avoid confrontation with him.
So I will significantly minimize how often I speak to him and how often I am in his prescence.
Normally I would say I could care less what someone thinks.....but he is my dad.....no, my father.....I thought I was special to him being his little baby girl......I guess not anymore. :'(
I have nothing against all white people. Just the ones who hurt me as a child. My neighbor is white and I love her like she was my own grandmother. She is as sweet as can be. So I never want to get on her bad side. Lol.
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