i told my mom that im pretty sure i have sa about a month ago, if not more. that day, i also asked her to help me find a doctor so i can get diagnosed & treated..every single day since then, ive asked her if she's found anything out with the insurance company, but every time i ask her, she just says, ill do it later, i havent had time, etc.
today, we got into a HUGE fight, i dont even know how it started. but i basically told her that i came to her for help, since i have absolutely no one else to turn to & she didnt do sh*t to help me when i asked her. & she told me that why would she do something for me when i never do anything for her? then she said that she constantly asks me to clean my room, but i never do it. seriously?! i didnt clean my room when she asked, so she doesnt find out any information for my, for lack of a better word, disabilities?!
god, im crying while writing this...here i thought my mom was the one person i could turn to, & now i just realized that i have no one. absolutely no one. ive never felt so alone in my entire life. & to top off my sa, i also know that ive fallen into a very deep depression. ha, i was thinking today, fine, shes not taking my pleas seriously, well maybe she'll realize just how serious it is when she finds me hanging from the ceiling.
no worries, i dont have the guts to do anything, nor will i, since i feel like i'd be missing so much..hehe suicide as revenge doesnt fix anything. i just find it kinda strange that ive thought about suicide since i was about 12..im 19. that isnt normal.
now that im done venting (sorry guys..i needed to get that out), i was wondering, for treating SA & depression, do i need to find a psychologist or a psychiatrist? im currently trying to move out of my parents' house & im a college student, so i dont really have any money to pay for treatment..& im on my family's insurance plan...but ik that if i dont get help soon, im just gonna go deeper into myself & idk if i can take anymore of that. so ive decided that if my mom wont help me, ill do everything myself. i just dont know how or where to even start...
today, we got into a HUGE fight, i dont even know how it started. but i basically told her that i came to her for help, since i have absolutely no one else to turn to & she didnt do sh*t to help me when i asked her. & she told me that why would she do something for me when i never do anything for her? then she said that she constantly asks me to clean my room, but i never do it. seriously?! i didnt clean my room when she asked, so she doesnt find out any information for my, for lack of a better word, disabilities?!
god, im crying while writing this...here i thought my mom was the one person i could turn to, & now i just realized that i have no one. absolutely no one. ive never felt so alone in my entire life. & to top off my sa, i also know that ive fallen into a very deep depression. ha, i was thinking today, fine, shes not taking my pleas seriously, well maybe she'll realize just how serious it is when she finds me hanging from the ceiling.
no worries, i dont have the guts to do anything, nor will i, since i feel like i'd be missing so much..hehe suicide as revenge doesnt fix anything. i just find it kinda strange that ive thought about suicide since i was about 12..im 19. that isnt normal.
now that im done venting (sorry guys..i needed to get that out), i was wondering, for treating SA & depression, do i need to find a psychologist or a psychiatrist? im currently trying to move out of my parents' house & im a college student, so i dont really have any money to pay for treatment..& im on my family's insurance plan...but ik that if i dont get help soon, im just gonna go deeper into myself & idk if i can take anymore of that. so ive decided that if my mom wont help me, ill do everything myself. i just dont know how or where to even start...
: I don't know how it works in your country, but is there just a local general doctor you can go to, explain your situation to, and ask about therapists/phsychologists,etc.